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Platonic · Jan 8, 2008, 12:59 PM

I have a 4yr old daughter that I have never seen. I live on the other side of the states from her. I pay child support faithfully, but yet I am never able to see her every time I get back home. There is always a reason why. Well I found out that her mother is getting married, and there was talk about adoption. Which is fine! She knows the other guy as dad anyway. And the mother and BF have a child together too. Well I guess I am asking the question about what I would have to go threw to give up my rights to my child and stop paying child support?. I have pushed with other lawyers but yet I get the run around. Please help..

George_1950 · Jan 8, 2008, 01:42 PM

The mother and boyfriend would have to marry. He would file a petition to adopt. Your parental rights could be terminated by your agreement with approval by the court; that part is different from state to state. Once the court approves or grants termination of your rights, your obligation to pay child support should end.

ScottGem · Jan 8, 2008, 01:43 PM

You can't do anything at this point. They would have to file for adoption by the new husband. As part of that process you will be asked to relinquish your rights. But if they choose NOT have him adopt there is nothing you can do, except go back to court for modification of the visitation schedule to enforce your rights.

Just a clarification of what George said. The Adoption is what would terminate your obligation to pay support, NOT the termination of your rights.

Poliwog2400 · Feb 13, 2008, 01:14 AM

Before I started reading all of these different answers about giving up parental rights I thought that you should be able to give them up and not have to pay child support but even if you give up your rights you still have to pay, unless for your situation you have someone who is going to adopt, but my response to your question is don't feel bad about not be able to see your child, but happy that you are supporting her for a good future if you decide to still pay some child support.

P.S. read my question I posted I'm needing some answers with child support issues.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 13, 2008, 07:27 AM

Yes at this point you have to wait for the mother to ask you to sign over your rights to allow her new partner to adopt.

I will corret George on one thing, not all states require the couple to be married, I am sure some still do, but many only require a committed relastionship even allowing homosexual partners permission to adopt. So it is not always married, although some do required married for at least one year

ScottGem · Feb 13, 2008, 07:29 AM

Chuck is right, the laws on this are all over the map. Some places don't require a married couple, others required being married for a minimum amount of time first. And everything in between.

The thing is the courts are looking for a stable home for the child. Therefore, they are more likely to approve such a request for a married couple, even if the law doesn't require it.