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clafairey · Feb 1, 2008, 03:51 AM

I didn't know which topic to post this under but oh well here goes...

My girlfriend Hannah, (20yo) who I have been with for a 18 months told me that she is feeling depressed because she so desparately wants a baby. I obviously can't give her this, and wouldn't want her to have one as yet as she is still doing her degree at uni and has 2 years left still, one of which she will be spending in Germany.

I am her first serious lesbian relationship, she has been with other women before but always broke it off when she thought it was getting too serious. Also, her previous relationship was with a guy (29yo) who she was with for 5 years. She fell pregnant twice to him. The 1st she had a miscarriage, the 2nd she had an abortion as she was only 13/14 at that time, and he will have been around 24 or so and would have ended up in prison. (Although that would have been fine by me. I hate him!)

When I met her, she was still with this guy, which I didn't have a clue about. Anyhow, it all blew up at one point, we had time to think and me and Hannah got back together. Since I 1st ever met her, she has always talked about children, and that she feels that's what she was born to do. When we watch any films with a pregnancy in them, or a baby etc, she gets quite upset.

The other day, she was sitting there for quite some time, with a cushion stuffed up her top as to make out she was pregnant. It worried me a little I have to admit. She seems so desperate for a baby and said if she could have the chance to get pregnant tomorrow, she would. I know she wouldn't have sex with another man behind my back, although she said she would if I was OK with it. If she wasn't able to become pregnant for whatever reason, she said she would be unbelievably depressed and talked of suicide. Also, there are risks to her having a baby as she is epileptic, which worry me so much.

Is this kind of thinking and behaviour normal? I know I want children in the future, but not so desparately. It all worries me a lot, I don't want her to be depressed over this.

templelane · Feb 1, 2008, 04:19 AM

I know queit a few broody lesbians but your girlfriend has taken it to the next level. If I were you I'd try and get her into counselling, I think she has some issues she needs to work out. Best wishes to the both of you, I'm sure other members will be along soon with more to say than me!

clafairey · Feb 1, 2008, 04:46 AM

She has counselling at the moment for a number of reasons, but hasn't brought her desparation to become pregnant up as yet. I'll encourage her to. Thanks

4thepeople2010 · May 21, 2010, 06:38 PM

Wow so young. Maybe it's because of the abortion and the miscarriage she had really, not about the fact that she wants a baby again. Maybe she made a mistake.

Wow... just wow. 20 and already had 2 kids with a guy ten years older than her?

Damn, where was her parents in all this?

clafairey · May 25, 2010, 12:20 PM

Her parents allowed her to move in with this guy. I think it's rather disgraceful but each to their own. I would have phoned the police on him if it was my child. Thanks for the replys people. This question no longer applies as we split up when she went to germany for the year last year. She's now with a guy that she had cheated on the other guy (that she fell pregnant to) with. Complicated and untrustworthy girl so it seems but I wish her the best.