[MarMar27]

Ok the father of my son and I are not together... I don't trust him with my son alone because of past issues the way he has treated me and the way he treated me when I was pregnant plus he has already gotten mad around the baby and scared him a couple of times he wasn't directly mad at him but he looses his patience so quick I don't know what to do I know he loves his son I mean he gives me money every week for him he's working but its just he's done so many things and he has anger issues we have been discussing about what I should do with the baby about the father getting him and what days and such I told him he can get him every other weekend and he just starts flipping out on me cause he wants him every weekend.. I just feel like he shouldn't get him every weekend.. what would the court say?! Someone help please I don't know what is right but I'm only doing what I feel is best for my child...

[N0help4u]

Let the court decide. Tell THEM that you want supervised visits because he has anger issues.
They will probably tell him that he has to take anger management classes. If they do supervised visits they might only let him have him for a few hours instead of a weekend since the supervisor wouldn't be there longer. Although if his parents or somebody agree to be supervisor then it is up to the Judge but you have your say about what you want and the Judge will take it into consideration.

[MarMar27]

Well usually he takes him like every sat and sun for some hours but I just never feel comfortable and I talked about with him but no one can talk to him everything is about him, him , him and that I'm selfish and I just want to take the baby away from him and Im like.. "im a mother and I worry for my son and I only do whats right for him" I don't do it to be selfish NO I want my son to be around his father and have a father but I don't want him to be scared of his father or feel uncomfortable around his dad because last time he came and got him he was frowning and started screaming.. what does that indicate? You know?

[N0help4u]

That is why you should take it to family court then the Judge decides.
Right now he wants you to make you feel obligated to do it his way OR ELSE...

[MarMar27]

Yep I know that is exactly what it is his way or ELSE.. but I don't really have any proof that he is a threat to my son only my family members can speak and the day my son was born he was escorted out of the hospital for yelling at me in the room the day after I gave birth because I didn't put him on the birth certificate! But I don't think it was written down or any report on it.. why would I want someone who wasn't even responsible for his actions during my pregnancy and someone who has anger problems on my sons birth certificate he didn't even work the whole time I was pregnant he put me through hell... verbal abuse always manipulating me he used me all kinds of things..

And its not about me but all that pretty much implies to now its just hard I love my son to death and I don't want him to be scared of his dad... and I don't want him growing up to his father always disrespecting me.

[Fr_Chuck]

You need to have court ordered custody agreement and court ordered child support,

[MarMar27]

Yeah... What custody do they usually give the fathers? When the mother is single? Or it depends on what I say?

[N0help4u]

Usually weekends and split holidays ---you thanksgiving/him/Christmas, etc... then switch the next year---and a week or so vacation; but if you say you don't trust him they might give him less than weekends until they determine if what you say is founded or not.

[MarMar27]

Oh OK... what about the birth certificate would they put him on there because I really don't want him on there.

[talaniman]

All your concerns can be addressed in court, and that takes all the personal stuff out of it. That includes child support. He sounds like a bully, so let the court do their job.

[MarMar27]

He's the type that would make up lies about me though just to get it his way