[heavyhearted]

Kay , so I was with this guy for 2 years and after the first 5 months I had to move , and he promised nothing would come between us. 2 months after I left he met someone and he left me for her and hurt me really bad. Then a week later I went there for a visit and we got back together and I didn't know to trust him again but I loved him so much. Things were okay so I thought, but it turned out he cheated on me with her and I didn't find out till 7 months later and he lied to me about being around her. I forgave him and we spent the summer together and he said the most amazing things to me and I believed every word and he promised me he wouldn't let her back into our lives and we planned for me to move back with him after a year or 2 and we'd keep having visits. A month after I got home, he started partying and acting like a jerk and I tried to hang onto him but he started hanging out with her again and it hurt so bad. When I broke up with him, he seemed upset and even though he got back with this girl he kept telling me he didn't want me to move on and that he loved me. Now he doesn't speak to me and I miss him so much and I want to know how to win back his heart because he may not seem like the same person but deep down I know he is and when you love someone you can't just stop that quickly and I do believe he loved me and I don't want to lose him for good, I love him too much and I think he's worth it. I just don't know how.. :(

[EuRa]

Wow, this guy you described is a tool. How could you like a guy that constantly treats you like! He cheated on you, then again, and lied. You think he respects you? Do you really think he wants to be with you forever and ever?

He doesn't. He wants to use you, at most. He looks at you like a piece of meat. If someone cheats on you, and you forgive him, that's only giving them the "ok" to do it all over again. AND HE DID! If you forgive him a second or third or fourth time, he's just going to keep doing it and doing it and doing it.

I guess if you want to live with heartbreak and depression the rest of your life, you should just accept it and let him use you whenever he gets bored. If you want to find someone else that will actually treat you right, then I suggest you get searching. Shy? Try craigslist, Yahoo personals, myspace, etc. Not so shy? Join a gym, laundramat, join dance class, etc.

But this guy is a tool. Don't fall for it. I was him once. I was in his position. I did the same he did. I used and abused the same girl for almost 5 years before she finally got the hint and dropped me like a ton of bricks. I tried REALLY HARD to get her back, but she didn't come back because she said I would just do it all over again.

And you know what? She's right. I would have. Learn from your mistakes. You deserve better treatment than that. You deserve a prince. Go find him, and be more careful this time.

[Bluerose]

If something hasn't clicked by now it never will. He is not interested in a serious relationship. You need to look for someone who is. Sounds to me like the kind of guy you likes to keep 'them' around just in case he has a night where he might find himself alone and he can always call one of his exs. Don't be that person.