[pices1]

Me and my boyfriend have a son togeather we have been togeather for 2years.he doesn't talk much about are problems.finaces,an ext.he has school 3 nights a week and meetings twice a month.we don't fight much,and allround he is a good man.but I don't think he loves me.he just not an open person.and its hard for me to be home by myself a lot with kids.we have 3all togeather.and they fight all the time.he knows I'm not happy,and that I want him to open up to me,and I still get nothing.I know I'm not first on his list.please help

[George_1950]

You need to consult a relationship/marriage counselor right away to discuss the pros and cons of your feelings. He may be too self-centered just now and need some re-direction from someone other than you.

[pices1]

Thans

[peggyhill]

I agree. Talking to a counselor is a great idea! Don't give up until you try to work it out first, especially since you have kids together. My fiancée doesn't talk a whole lot either. I mean he's a great guy, but just has a quiet personality. I love him, but it does drive me bonkers sometimes! So I understand that! :)

Talking to a counselor can help both of you learn better ways to communicate, deal with issues etc. If it isn't possible financially, consider reading a relationship book together or, if you are religious, maybe meeting with a religious leader so he/she can help you talk about your relationship issues.

Good luck! Hope all works out!

[pices1]

Thanks for reply.I will take any good advice.

[mafiaangel180]

Like the others said, definitely go to counseling together. And by the way, just because a man isn't open doesn't mean he doesn't love you. I hope everything works out for you.

[pices1]

Thanks for advice,I need it.it just hard to keep trying to make things work,when he seems to add more activities to his schedule.when I always tell him I need a break.or make a remark about it must be nice to have a life.we do things as a family.but never just me and him.and I tell him I wanted to go back to school,but I have to wait tell he can stay with the kids.sometime I think am I the one being selfish.cause I need more help at home.sometimes I think I will have more flexibility if I left him.

[kochi]

Ask him exactly what you are asking us. Sit him down and make him talk. Nicely of course

[talaniman]

How old are you and he, and the ages of your kids please??

[pices1]

We have a 11month old son,and I have a 7 yearold,he has a 13,and 15 year old daughters,the 13 year old lives with us and the 15 year old comes on weekends.im 27,and he's 35.we got a big family all ages.lol.wow...

[Smoked]

Lots of good advice, seek counsel. Any qualified counsel, godly, professional, etc. If he isn't willing it may be a great gauge of how serious he is about his relationship.

Something to think about. Not all men show love in a manner conducive to a successful relationship. A lot of it is a lack of communication. You mentioned he is very busy, a good man and go on to say " I don't think he loves me". Is it something he has done? Something he hasn't done? Have you discussed with him your feelings and how has he responded?

Remember anyone can tell you they love you. Have you and him made a mind will decision to be devoted to each other, cherish each other and value each other above all else? Does he reciprocate that feeling in other ways besides a verbal "l love you"? This could be a key into knowing more how he feels.

[talaniman]

My dear you need a vacation. I feel you are overwhelmed with the needs of others. You also have tons of help around you, to get a break. I think in the next few years, you will have a lot more time on your hands to develop yourself, and the things you enjoy doing that makes you happy and fulfilled. For now I think it's a matter of managing your time, and delegating responsibility, where you can have some relaxing YOU time. Your kind of young to have older kids around you but they can be a big help for household duties and that baby needs your constant attention right now, I know. What a diverse age range you have going. I know your husband is busy, as the sole provider, but he still has to give all those kids some quality face time, and you a good afternoon nap every now and then, so approach him about this and let him know, its okay for a man to keep his infant for a while, so you can just gab with the girls. It takes two to set the framework for how a family is run, and my wife hit the roof when I wanted to go running off with the boys, and she wanted a break. Being a stay at home mom is rough, and hard work, so occasionally (regularly) you need a day off, just like any working person does. Plan for it. You will feel so much better about yourself, and your life. I still am reaping the benefits, and blessings, of giving my wife a hand around the house, (small though it was) and some free time, to do what ever she wants. I'm sure he could be convinced.