[keeblo069]

Hello,
I was wondering if any one could give me some advice. I reside in New York, and my child's father resides in FL. The baby was born in NY. My sons father wants to give up his paternal rights. Does this mean he is not financially obligated anymore and that he can never see his child again. Do I have to agree to this for it to happen or can he do it on his own.
If he decides that he does want to be a part of the child's life do I have to pay half of his travel expenses for him to come and see the baby? Can I be forced to change the child's last name? He has mine right now, but the father said that if he decides to take responsibility that he will have the courts force me to change his last name can they do that? Also if he gets visitation does that mean he get the child all summer and every holiday?
He keeps telling me that his lawyer is telling him all this stuff, but I am not sure if he really is talking to a lawyer or he is just lying. I can't afford a lawyer and legal aid said I make too much money so please hep!
The child has never seen his father, he is still young (4months). Should I just let him sign over his rights? Or do you all think that I should hold him accountable?

[macksmom]

Whoa whoa lol slow down here... ok lets sort out all these questions...

Does this mean he is not financially obligated anymore and that he can never see his child again. Do I have to agree to this for it to happen or can he do it on his own.

No, if he tries to relinquish his rights that will only make it so he has no control over decisions and the upbringing of the child.
He will still be required to pay child support.
He can try this on his own... but it's not going to work the way he thinks it is... it's not going to end support.

If he decides that he does want to be a part of the child's life do I have to pay half of his travel expenses for him to come and see the baby?

I highly highly doubt it... but you may be ordered to meet him halfway for visitation.

Can I be forced to change the child's last name? He has mine right now, but the father said that if he decides to take responsibility that he will have the courts force me to change his last name can they do that?

The father would have to petition in court to have the child's last name changed to his... this really could go either way, it just depends on the judge and the age of the child.

Also if he gets visitation does that mean he get the child all summer and every holiday?

Again, that is up to the courts and what they order for visitation. Usually holidays are alternated between parents... but for example with my order, I got my daughters father to agree to split every holiday so we would both get to be with our child on every holiday. But with your distance this may be very different... again, it all depends what the judge orders... there are no definites before then.

The child has never seen his father, he is still young (4months). Should I just let him sign over his rights? Or do you all think that I should hold him accountable?

The courts won't even allow him to relinquish ALL rights unless there is someone to adopt the child in the bio-fathers place... regardless if you agree or not.
He needs to pay child support to help raise this child.


And you need to find a way to hire an attorney... he has one... you REALLY need to get one if you plan to have everything go fairly in court.

[Fr_Chuck]

1. He can not give up any rights even if he wants to, if you don't let him

2. nromally unless you have a new partner to adopt, even if he gives up his rights, he still has to pay child support.

3. in legal terms what he is doing is lying to you and trying to scare you into doing something you don't have to do, because he is scared and too cheap to pay the support he is suppose to pay

4. if he gets visitation it will be what it is, some it is every other weekend, some it is a few weeks, some it is all summer it is what ever your attorney and his attorney either agree to, or what the judge ends up deciding

5. and first since his name is not on the birth certificate there has to be a court order for a DNA test to prove he is the father, You should get an attorney and file first, file for full custody and limited visitation. And of course child support. This is what he is afraid of, he wants to lie to you and convince you to sign some document that he does not have to pay child support. ** my opinion anyway.