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    in a state's Avatar
    in a state Posts: 80, Reputation: 12
    Junior Member
     
    #121

    Dec 26, 2007, 03:20 PM
    You sure you want to be with me
    I've nothing to give
    Won't lie and say this lovin's best
    Leave us in emotional peace
    Take a walk, taste the rest
    No, take a rest
    ihatewestseneca's Avatar
    ihatewestseneca Posts: 325, Reputation: 67
    Full Member
     
    #122

    Dec 26, 2007, 10:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by in a state
    You sure you want to be with me
    I've nothing to give
    Won’t lie and say this lovin's best
    Leave us in emotional peace
    Take a walk, taste the rest
    No, take a rest

    Who would this be directed at? Is this just the general opinion of women that want a break or what?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #123

    Dec 27, 2007, 06:00 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by in a state
    You sure you want to be with me
    I've nothing to give
    Won’t lie and say this lovin's best
    Leave us in emotional peace
    Take a walk, taste the rest
    No, take a rest
    I took it as a dumper, talking to a dumpee, Fits both ways, man or woman.
    in a state's Avatar
    in a state Posts: 80, Reputation: 12
    Junior Member
     
    #124

    Dec 27, 2007, 10:17 AM
    It's a song by massive atack I have been listening to lately.
    I was the dumpee and those lyrics somewhat helped me calm down a bit,I guess they've made me understand the situation-that there was nothing (for him)to give,it wasn't the best thing I could ever have ,and I should pull myself together.
    I don't know,my comfort is in those lyrics and I thought maybe someone else on this forum would feel the same way.
    ihatewestseneca's Avatar
    ihatewestseneca Posts: 325, Reputation: 67
    Full Member
     
    #125

    Dec 27, 2007, 10:31 AM
    Cool, the soundtrack form Juno makes me feel happy. 9.99 on itunes for 19 songs... not bad at all.
    in a state's Avatar
    in a state Posts: 80, Reputation: 12
    Junior Member
     
    #126

    Dec 27, 2007, 08:20 PM
    Well I think it's lovely that we can talk about healing art instead of freaking out ''omg it's been 3 days 9 months and 2 seconds NC'' now really.
    I don't know about you guys but this constant reminder that I've lost something and how long it's been since I met/saw/heard about/talked to my ex is not helping me at all. I'll move away from this thread and I wish you all a very HAPPY new year!
    Listen to ''All is full of love'' by Bjork
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
    Ultra Member
     
    #127

    Dec 27, 2007, 10:14 PM
    Perception is in the eye of the beholder, or something like that? I couldn't disagree more that with this: "this constant reminder that i've lost something and how long it's been since i met/saw/heard about/talked to my ex is not helping me at all." That is not the reason for this thread. This thread is a small place where you can pat yourself (and others) on the back; for me, 12/27/07 was the 30th day since NC and I am proud of that, and look forward to 60 and 90. I agree with the notion that one can spend too much time swimming in pity; but pity and NC are really different, in my view.
    roogirl's Avatar
    roogirl Posts: 69, Reputation: 18
    Junior Member
     
    #128

    Dec 28, 2007, 04:29 AM
    I am on day 19. The first week I was fine, I felt empowered and I felt like I made a giant leap to getting on with my life. Unfortunately over the last week I've been a blubbering teary eyed mess, brought on by the holidays and spending too much time alone.

    However I have still not made any contact and obviously neither has he. Thus far I have stood firm so hopefully I can continue this good run even though it's hurting like hell.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #129

    Dec 28, 2007, 04:45 AM
    Good to see you again Roo, Glad you finally made your.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
    Ultra Member
     
    #130

    Dec 28, 2007, 04:21 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by roogirl
    I am on day 19. The first week I was fine, I felt empowered and I felt like I made a giant leap to getting on with my life. Unfortunately over the last week I've been a blubbering teary eyed mess, brought on by the holidays and spending too much time alone.

    However I have still not made any contact and obviously neither has he. Thus far I have stood firm so hopefully I can continue this good run even though it's hurting like hell.
    Hi Roogirl
    I have read back through your post and you have been through quite a journey. You seem like you are very strong , good on you.
    The holiday season is hard for everyone in this situation so don't feel alone , the feeling is totally normal. Stay strong and don't break NC and go back to square one.

    And remember we are all on here if you ever need someone to talk to.

    Here's to 2008 and your new life :-)
    roogirl's Avatar
    roogirl Posts: 69, Reputation: 18
    Junior Member
     
    #131

    Dec 29, 2007, 06:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by friend4u178
    Hi Roogirl
    I have read back through your post and you have been through quite a journey. You seem like you are very strong , good on you.
    The holiday season is hard for everyone in this situation so don't feel alone , the feeling is totally normal. Stay strong and don't break NC and go back to square one.

    And remember we are all on here if you ever need someone to talk to.

    Here's to 2008 and your new life :-)
    Oh I wish I was so strong, but unfortunately I'm not. I've been secretely holding on to the hope that he might come back, but he won't. If he wanted to come back he would have by now. I miss him so much. I divorced my cheating husband (hooray! That's a good thing). But divorcing him was like a walk in the park in comparison to this. I think I got involved with someone too soon afterward, but boy I loved this man so much.
    xcookiemonstorx's Avatar
    xcookiemonstorx Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #132

    Dec 29, 2007, 07:03 AM
    Well the day before yesterday was my first day of NC. I fell asleep holding my phone and carry it in my pocket at all times. Its like I know that after what he's done things will never be the same. But I still feel in denial. This all happened so fast. I think NC will help me move on. Because he already has a new girlfriend (the one he cheated on me with) after less than one week. The only thing is I have to get my dog tomorro and some couches. I hope he's not there because I'm scared of what I may say. I don't know how I will feel in time but right now I feel betrayed and alone yet still in love. :(
    ISneezeFunny's Avatar
    ISneezeFunny Posts: 4,175, Reputation: 821
    Ultra Member
     
    #133

    Dec 29, 2007, 07:45 AM
    Week 3 is ova.

    I'm feeling great. I'm doing awesome.

    As well as I'm doing, it makes me wonder... it's only been 3 weeks of NC from a 3 year relationship. I'm already feeling... decently. Funny how the human mind works.

    Some people would say YOU Didn't LOVE HER. Actually... I did. I really did. I guess I get over people easily.
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
    Ultra Member
     
    #134

    Dec 29, 2007, 07:56 AM
    Thanks for this update; I expect roogirl and xcookiemonstorx will be feeling better, if not much better, around late January. Each day can be a painful process and there needs to be some positive things to do (coping strategies), other than tears and self-pity. But all of it is part of the cure for heartache, it seems.
    roogirl's Avatar
    roogirl Posts: 69, Reputation: 18
    Junior Member
     
    #135

    Dec 29, 2007, 04:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xcookiemonstorx
    well the day before yesterday was my first day of NC. i fell asleep holding my phone and carry it in my pocket at all times. its like i know that after what hes done things will never be the same. but i still feel in denial. this all happened so fast. i think NC will help me move on. bc he already has a new girlfriend (the one he cheated on me with) after less than one week. the only thing is i have to get my dog tomorro and some couches. i hope hes not there bc im scared of what i may say. i dont know how i will feel in time but right now i feel betrayed and alone yet still in love. :(

    Well done for your first day of NC. Take it one day at a time, some days will be easier than others and other days will be absolute murder, take it from me, but you must remain strong. I can understand why you feel betrayed that happened to me too. Let them have each other, they deserve each other. One day it will be this new girl's turn to cry when your ex cheats on her too. It will only be a matter of time.
    spartan24018's Avatar
    spartan24018 Posts: 61, Reputation: 12
    Junior Member
     
    #136

    Dec 29, 2007, 05:04 PM
    Well guys, it's only been my 3rd day of complete No Contact. I still carry my phone and check it every 2 hours or so, still hoping she might call or something. It's pretty pathetic, I feel kind of low about it. But for now, these 2 days have been great. I mean if she wanted to get back together or wanted to be friends, she would've contacted me :confused: . Really sad thing is that I'm still in love with her. I just don't know why she started to completely ignore me these past days, it's been murder :(. Well guys, here's to a new year and a new life, I wish everyone the best of luck.
    roogirl's Avatar
    roogirl Posts: 69, Reputation: 18
    Junior Member
     
    #137

    Dec 29, 2007, 06:16 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by spartan24018
    Well guys, it's only been my 3rd day of complete No Contact. I still carry my phone and check it every 2 hours or so, still hoping she might call or something. It's pretty pathetic, I feel kinda low about it. But for now, these 2 days have been great. I mean if she wanted to get back together or wanted to be friends, she would've contacted me :confused: . Really sad thing is that I'm still in love with her. I just don't know why she started to completely ignore me these past days, it's been murder :(. Well guys, here's to a new year and a new life, I wish everyone the best of luck.
    Keep going with the no contact, I know it's murder, and you are not pathetic, you are behaving like someone who has just had their heart broken, we have all been through that. I still check my email and my Yahoo about 10 times a day, all with the same result, a bit fat nothing. I think we do this because we are looking for ways to numb the pain.

    Here is something that might help you, and I quote: 'Quite honestly, they will be more intrigued by the fact that you didn't call than if you did. Not keeping the lines of communication open says a lot about somebody. It says they've moved on and are not interested in spending their valuable time on someone who doesn't want to be with them' taken from the book 'it's called a breakup because it's broken' by Greg Behrendt and Amiira Rutola-Behrendt. This is a book written primarily for the girl but I think this quote applies with both sexes.
    ihatewestseneca's Avatar
    ihatewestseneca Posts: 325, Reputation: 67
    Full Member
     
    #138

    Dec 29, 2007, 09:01 PM
    NC is freakin hard when your friends are busy with their girlfriends and you have almost nothing to do...
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
    Ultra Member
     
    #139

    Dec 29, 2007, 09:12 PM
    It is hard, but it beats the alternative; don't think about what your ex is doing and do whatever else you have to do to re-establish yourself. And check this out:
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...sh-114179.html
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #140

    Dec 29, 2007, 09:37 PM
    I think despite the times, you all are doing better than you think, and should have hope for the coming year. May it be HAPPY!

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