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dolphinlove5777 · Dec 12, 2007, 11:55 AM

Will my husband (we are not divorced or legally seperated) get overnight visitation with my daughter if he is living with his mistress? :)

mrsjstevens · Dec 12, 2007, 12:03 PM

Don't see why not. As long as no one in the household could be considered a danger to the child. While you are not legally separated, you are separated right? So why are you considering her a mistress? If you are having separation issues with your husband, do no try to take it out on your children. It will only make their life miserable.

macksmom · Dec 12, 2007, 12:21 PM

I'm not sure much will be done until you are legally separated of divorced.

Your best bet would be to hire and attorney, as you will need one anyway for the divorce.

ScottGem · Dec 12, 2007, 12:24 PM

Visitation is generally court ordered. So I suspect, since you say there has been no legal agreement, that you are asking what WILL happen when you go to court. Since you don't say how old the child is, its harder to judge. But unless there is a danger to the child I see no reason why overnights wouldn't be granted.

sunnyMI · Dec 18, 2007, 04:55 PM

You need to consider what is in the best interest for your daughter! If you don't want you daughter to have overnights just because he lives with his "mistress" but he shows no reasons as to being an unfit father, than I think it is selfish. Your marital issues and personal issues need to be set aside and when it comes to your daughter. It is very important for her to be in her father's life. Don't let your daughter's time with her dad be stopped or limited because of any anger you may have with him. Children need BOTH parents in their lives.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 18, 2007, 05:31 PM

Well if you are not divorced or legally separated, he has as much legal right to take the kids and have custody of them as you do. So right now all he has to do is have them.

Now when you file for divorce and child custody, of course he will get overnihgt visits unless there is something else that makes him a danger to the kids.

dolphinlove5777 · Dec 18, 2007, 06:33 PM

First of all it is not selfish when my husband has not been involved in my daughters life for the first 4 years. He has spent a total of 50 hours with her since her birth 4 years ago. Also I am a firm believer in my faith, as I am raising and have been raising my daughter by myself I am also teaching her values and I am very sorry if I feel like living with your mistress while your going to marriage counsling with your wife is not high on the "morality" chart. His mother and father are drunks and the mother was arrested for abuse. His sister was put into the hospital for mental distebance. So I am sorry if some of you feel that I am being selfish because I am concerned about what my daughter will be subjected to. Thanks for the advice but I talked with a lawyer instead!

ScottGem · Dec 18, 2007, 06:44 PM

Talking to a lawyer is what you should have done in the first place, since you have to go to court to get this resolved anyway.

And while I can understand your faith and sense of morality, that is not going to weigh heavily in a judge's decision.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 18, 2007, 07:34 PM

yes, faith, moral values and religion have little base in court, And I have to question why you would be in counseling with him to get back together if he was living with another person, that seems a little strange.

And to be honest, it does sound to me ( as it may sound to the court) that you are mad at him and wish to limit visits as a method hurting him.
The courts will want to see what risk he may be (I not his mother, not his neighbor) but him.

I hope you take time in medication to work out visits, I am afraid you will end up spending thousands and thousands of dollars to find out a judge will almost always allow visits unless there is direct danager