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jamiew3 · Mar 23, 2005, 01:07 PM

I just got new carpet and it is dark so everything shows up on it. I also have a 1 year old and I am annoying clean. I had a sign on my door that said Welcome, please remove shoes upon entering thank you. Everyone who comes to my house takes there shoes off and my mother in law did too, however one day she decided I guess that she wasn't going to. I don't understand why? She is very easy to get along with and this behavior is not like her. So I just recently had a big birthday party for my daughter and it was the first time my husbands family had been to our new house( with the exception of his parents). I put a new sign on my door to see if my mother in law got the hint, it was not so nice this time, It said in very big print SHOES OFF AT DOOR!
No one in my husband's family took there shoes off and my husband said something to his mom because she is there often, mom take your shoes off we have a baby crawling around, she said my shoes are clean and walked away. I am not sure what to do but I feel like she is really disrespecting me?

phr0ze · Mar 25, 2005, 11:53 PM

She's probably testing you to see how you will react. Will you let her continue to do this, will you speak to her about it, or will you have your husband speak to her? I think it is very disrespectful. And I am sorry you are in this situation because I don't see an easy way out.

Good luck.

Brooke123102 · Dec 14, 2007, 11:24 AM

In general terms of etiquette you have a right to ask visitors in your home to remove their shoes. Mother-in-laws can be a bit of a problem when they think a "rule" at their son's house is something his wife insists on. She is testing the boundaries. Unfortunately, your husband may have to be the one to stand up to her and his family. If she is a matriarch-type she sets the tone for the rest of his family. Your husband should tell his mother that shoes are not allowed in the house and if she insists on wearing shoes you would prefer she purchase a new pair of slippers to leave at your home and only wear when she is there. That way you could insure that the shoes are not being worn outside and she can wer shoes I fshe feels the need. Some people are embarrassed of their feet. Either way your husband will have to lay down the law because it is evident that she does not respect you enough to do it.
GOOD LUCK!

N0help4u · Dec 14, 2007, 07:28 PM

My aunt's house was like a museum. She had plastic on the furniture and roped off the rooms with the velvet rope like cinemas and banks use. She didn't want to deal with people walking in the front door and directly onto the carpet so she had them go to the back door and into the kitchen so that at least the dirt on the shoes might not be as bad by the time that the people who refused to take their shoes off got to the carpeting.

So my suggestion is have people use another door if you have one that doesn't go directly to the rooms with carpeting... and maybe they will find this more inconvenient and think again about not taking their shoes off.
I would even put a big piece of furniture in front of the door so they can't ask for exceptions.