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    thats_life's Avatar
    thats_life Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 30, 2007, 07:57 AM
    He's a virgin and I'm not
    So I met this guy a while ago and we really hit it off.
    I thought it was getting a little too serious too quick, and I let him know. That's when he said "i'm a virgin" and he's 23. I don't understand because he seems fricken perfect to me, why wouldn't he have gotten laid? He's not particularly spiritual... but he's never been in a serious relationship before.

    I don't care so much about it, but I'm not a virgin, and I was sexually assaulted almost a year ago, and he gave me herpes. I told him this also and he wasn't put off by it.

    It feels weird, to have someone as pure as him... want someone like me.

    So do I break it off before it gets too serious or just let it be?
    Morton35's Avatar
    Morton35 Posts: 26, Reputation: 4
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    #2

    Nov 30, 2007, 09:31 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by thats_life
    So i met this guy a while ago and we really hit it off.
    i thought it was getting a little too serious too quick, and i let him know. thats when he said "i'm a virgin" and hes 23. I dont understand because he seems fricken perfect to me, why wouldnt he have gotten laid? hes not particularly spiritual....but hes never been in a serious relationship before.

    i dont care so much about it, but im not a virgin, and i was sexually assaulted almost a year ago, and he gave me herpes. i told him this also and he wasnt put off by it.

    it feels weird, to have someone as pure as him...want someone like me.

    so do i break it off before it gets too serious or just let it be?
    If you like him, and he likes you, I see no reason to break it off.

    And why would it feel weird that he likes you? He's not put off by the fact you were assaulted a year ago or that you have herpes, so what's the problem? Maybe he really likes you for who you are and he isn't concerned about those other things.

    And as far as him being a virgin, don't let that influence your decision on what to do about this relationship. Maybe he just never met a girl he liked enough.

    The question, however, is do YOU want to be serious? If you don't, then you need to tell him now and break it off. You're doing him a lot more good by letting him know up front then dragging him along for months making him wonder what is wrong.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Nov 30, 2007, 10:01 AM
    Someone like you? What do you mean, a nice caring person, who did not want to get too serious too fast?

    It sound like you have some self worth issues and counseling may help you know you are just as special as anyone else, And our past is just that our past,

    A person can love anyone, if that is where their heart is, a person in a wheel chair, one with one arm missing, everyone has the right to happiness and others often don't mind because they have found a real love.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #4

    Nov 30, 2007, 08:23 PM
    Just enjoy your relationship with him. We all learn things from each other as long as we are not manipulative. :):):)
    (all you have to be on guard against is making sure he wears a condom if you have sex)

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