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    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 20, 2007, 11:18 PM
    ismy mom okay?
    my grandpa died about three months ago he was my moms dad and he did of a few things including the fact that he was an alocoholic. It was pretty sudden and since the week before he died my mom has drankevery day.(but two days) even on work nights and everything (she doesn't get drunk all the nights but only like 3) its hard for me to watch because I asked her to stop and she won't. I don't know if its just apart of the grieving process and this is just a phase or is it more than that?(( on a normal week before this happened she would only drink like 2 x a week)) would you say this is being an alcoholic? I don't know if its seroius yet? What should I do
    charlotte234s's Avatar
    charlotte234s Posts: 1,903, Reputation: 143
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    #2

    Nov 20, 2007, 11:22 PM
    If she is getting drunk a lot, and it is affecting her family, social life, or work, or she has blackouts or passes out, then yes, she is considered an alcoholic. Alcoholism is a disease and people who have alcoholic parents are more likely to become alcoholics. Have you talked to her about seeking help or treatment?
    WhitePolish383's Avatar
    WhitePolish383 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Nov 20, 2007, 11:36 PM
    When it comes to drinking alcohol excessively, it is ALWAYS a serious matter. Yes, this is apart of your mother's grieving process, but it is apsolutly not the right way for her to handle it. You should try talking to your mother. Maybe try telling one of your family members that is close to you or one of your mom's friends. I wouldn't recommend just telling anyone. Unless she is causing any physical harm to you or anyone else including herself and/or pets. You really need to just sit down with her and talk to her about how her drinking makes you feel. Tell her you want your mom back. The way she used to be before she started drinking so much. You might suggest doing an activity when she comes home from work. Even if its not going anywhere. You could watch a movie and eat popcorn something like that. I would also recommend talking to her about your grandfathers passing. Maybe some counseling would be good in this situation, too. I hope my advice has helped you in some way. If you have anymore questions please feel free to e-mail me at anytime, and let me know how things are going.
    grammadidi's Avatar
    grammadidi Posts: 1,182, Reputation: 468
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    #4

    Nov 20, 2007, 11:54 PM
    First of all you should talk to her with love and caring, when she is sober. If that doesn't help, then you should talk to your other adult family members about this. If someone doesn't listen, then talk to another responsible adult that you trust. Do NOT be afraid to tell. If your mom has been a good mom up to this point all that will happen is that people will try to help her. That is exactly what you want.

    She is probably using the alcohol to numb her pain, but what she doesn't realize is that alcohol might help you to forget for awhile, but then it hits you twice as hard when you are sober. She may need to see a doctor for some anti-depressants or find a therapist to help her through this. Obviously, she needs help. Don't let it go. Tell her how very worried you are and how much you love and need her.

    If she continues to drink, please contact your local Alateen group. They can help you a LOT!

    Hugs, Didi
    Angel_Wings's Avatar
    Angel_Wings Posts: 105, Reputation: 13
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Nov 21, 2007, 03:43 AM
    mareex17

    Hi Sweetie,
    I'm sorry you've lost your grampa, and your Mom her Dad.

    Please do contact Al-Anon in your area (Alateen is part of Al-Anon).
    If you can't find the info you need from the link on Didi's post.
    Just try your local phone book, or contact a few churches.

    Let your Mom know that you love her.
    ... and do try and talk with her when she is sober.
    As other's have said talk with a trusted adult about your Mom.

    Mostly I would urge you to contact Al-Anon, as you will find other people
    Who are struggling with the drinking problems of those they love.
    You will get counsel/advice on how you can help your loved one,
    ... and how you can help yourself!!

    It is a very painful time for you and your Mom.

    May God be with you both.
    rbnla's Avatar
    rbnla Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Nov 25, 2007, 04:50 PM
    Comment on Angel_Wings's post
    Definitely the best advice!

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