[Jonnybeats737]

Ever heard money can't buy happiness.

I am living proof of this. I have worked and worked to finally be able to afford everything Ive ever wanted in life, but now that I have it , I find myself passionless. I feel as if everyone around me is so extremely enthused and passionate about everything but I can't find that in my body, its almost as if, all I am are my exterior senses. Except now my interior feels like crap. Im not a mean person or anything, Ive done everything I've ever could to help people, I've giving so much to everyone and I've donated years of time to people in need. Ive flown to Nicaragua to help people in need. But for some odd reason, I don't feel happy at all. In everyone's life I find balance, except mine. And they confirm it to, they find a balance between the ill things in life and the good things. I feel as if Ive giving so much and worked so hard only to realize that working so hard for all these things was pointless, and that seen starving children, broke my heart. My childhood having been filled with abuse, and fights, and police and divorce and my teenager life being filled with bullying and bad marks, the only thing I've eveer been good at was filmmaking which I made money in but I don't even like it, Im just good at it. I feel so hopeless, I feel like I'm constantly waiting. Doesn't anyone else feel similar. (btw I'm not depressed or in a depressive state) I'm more annoyed that this is the way things are working for me.

[MissingHim2Much]

But do you have LOVE?? My ex and I were dirt poor, but we were happy. I've never had money so I can't really comment on that but I know that if you have love then you have everything.

[Jonnybeats737]

I used to be in love with this girl once, she just didn't see it though I guess, but I just don't know what to do, I'm not ugly or anything, but for some reason I'm always the friend you know, I'm the nice guy. Someone once told me I was too soft to meet any real women, but I try to believe he didn't know what he was talking about.

[Jonnybeats737]

Good question

[MissingHim2Much]

I hear that a lot too.. Like women only want bad boys or something. Well I'm female and I would take a nice guy over a bad boy any day. Don't change who you are and someday soon a woman will love you just the way you are.

[cerisa]

You hit a chord with me. My husband and I worked very hard for success, and it is the working toward it that is the most rewarding. "Things" just become clutter after you acquire them.
Life's rewards are all a matter of perspective. My husband is now very sick, what counts the most for me now is the time I can spend with him. I am happy for every day we share. I cherish our time together.

I can't get a fix on your age Jonny, but the times come when we take stock, and beat ourselves up for not achieving this milestone or that goal. It will pass. Live your life according to your own timetable. Waiting is not so bad,like fishing, it can be a productive thing. Or maybe you have been fishing in the wrong stream.

If you have given to charity what you feel comfortable with, that is all you can do.
We are not any of us so powerful as to fix all the poverty or wrongs in the world. That you care, and do some things ,counts for more than those who never even make the attempt. Remember the story of the man walking on the shore tossing starfish into the water? Makes all the difference to that one.

An unhappy childhood is in your past, leave it in the past, we can only live forward. Give yourself permission to be content with who you are now.
BTW congratulations on your success on filmmaking, others must enjoy it or it would not be successful.

[Sad Soul]

I understand.

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's mentally/emotionally draining when it comes to questioning life, passion, and so on. Obviously though, we question these things when life isn't “right enough” that we have to step back and evaluate its purpose.

You need love. What's the point of having the great life you have, when there isn't someone else to share it with? That said—don't worry. When “she” or “whatever it is” comes into your life, suddenly this will all make sense. I promise that one day, all the pieces of this confusing puzzle will come together.

In the mean time, all you can do is be the best you can be. If you can't control what you “don't know” or what you are “confused about” or “missing”, then why don't you continue focusing on all the things that are clearly in your own hands. Keep improving your career path, work out, eat healthy, save money, read, write, and become smarter. And then, whenever what was missing comes into your life, it will catch up to the best of you.

[kiki_doki]

Hello Jonny,
Do you not think that being unhappy or always wanting more is just a human condition? Also Needing someone or having someone to love might not fill this void in your life, happiness has to (first) be present within you, a partner mearley adds to what happiness you already have. You spoke about things you have been through, maybe you should re-visit this past and talk to people who shared this time with you.It didn't feel as though you were satisfied with how it panned out.Sometimes it easier to keep reminding yourself of all the positive things you have going for you and if you ever, ever get tired of all your money I would be more then happy to rid you of this burden... He he he (",)