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jefferyjordan · Nov 18, 2007, 12:01 AM

I divorced about 8 years ago. They take my child support out of my check every week. My Ex-wife took my kids and moved them out of state and remarried. She has not let me see my kids in over 6 yrs. My oldest daughter turned 18 yrs old lasy year and has contacted me. She no longer lives with her mother. She told me that her mother says she is sending me papers for back child support that she hasn't received any in over 7months.I have since moved to the state that she lives in. Can she do that? Wouldn't she have to take me back to court in the state we were divorced in. 6 years ago she had me in court and the judge said that she had to let me see them or she would be held in contempt. She just never came back to the state so I could get her for contempt. Is there any thing I can do?

charlotte234s · Nov 18, 2007, 12:03 AM

You should get a lawyer and get visitation rights, that sounds really unfair to you.

excon · Nov 18, 2007, 06:39 AM

Hello j:

You have plenty of rights. You just have to go to court to exercise 'em. Apparently, you haven't. Bummer.

Seems as though this was OK until you're asked to pay.. I don't know.

excon

Fr_Chuck · Nov 18, 2007, 07:08 AM

Yes, you had rights for years, but just failed to use them, you had to try and take her back to court time andt ime again over the years,

Even why did you not file to stop her from moving out of state back then.

Sorry but if you don't use your rights you can't complain

jefferyjordan · Nov 20, 2007, 06:47 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Yes, you had rights for years, but just failed to use them, you had to try and take her back to court time andt ime again over the years,

Even why did you not file to stop her from moving out of state back then.

sorry but if you don't use your rights you can't complain

First of all, she didn't tell me she was leaving because if she would have I would have done that. Secondly, how do you know if I failed to use them. Apparently you've never had to go through this or you would know how hard it is for a father to get anything done.

Celestrea · Nov 20, 2007, 10:08 AM

You have to file papers in the court where you were divorced for contempt of court of the mother. Have you ever done that?

ScottGem · Nov 20, 2007, 11:27 AM

I have to agree with the others, you had rights but failed to exercise them.

The first issue is whether there was a visitation agreement as part of the divorce. If there was and she moved far enough away so that you couldn't exercise your visitation rights, then she violated the court order. You should have IMMEDIATELY filed against her then. Next, according to you, she took you to court for something and she was ordered to allow visitation and again she violated the court order and again, you apparently didn't do anything about it.

Niow, she claims she is filing for back support, but that doesn't make sense. You specifically state that "they take my child support...". This indicates to me that your wages are garnished. The amount they are collecting should have included back support.

She would not necessarily have to file in the state you were divorced. But she would have to go to court for this. While support and visitation are different things, if she goes to court you can counter sue her for violating the visitation agreements.

JudyKayTee · Nov 20, 2007, 12:35 PM

Originally Posted by jefferyjordan

First of all, she didn't tell me she was leaving because if she would have I would have done that. Secondly, how do you know if I failed to use them. Apparently you've never had to go through this or you would know how hard it is for a father to get anything done.

Please don't assume no one has ever been through this - you asked for information and advice, you got it. You may not like it but...

All right - she didn't tell you she was leaving. What did you do when you found out she was gone? Did you exercise your rights then?

She can request the Court to transfer jurisdiction to where she now resides.