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    lil101's Avatar
    lil101 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 21, 2007, 11:17 AM
    I don't believe in god but want to get christened
    I am an aethiast and I don't believe in god. The rest of my family is catholic and my mum keeps telling me I should get christened, but I know that if I get christened I have to believe in god. What should I do?:confused:
    TheSavage's Avatar
    TheSavage Posts: 564, Reputation: 96
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    #2

    Apr 21, 2007, 11:25 AM
    Being christened will not make you believe in god or mean you have to believe. Heck I was also christened many years ago and I am a non-believer too.
    Just try to explain to your mom that it would be a waste of water lol. -- Savage
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
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    #3

    May 22, 2007, 03:50 PM
    Tell your Mom no. Explain that being christened and being an atheist is like mixing oil with water. Why make a mockery out of your professed non belief?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    May 22, 2007, 04:40 PM
    If you don't believe there is no use.
    bushg's Avatar
    bushg Posts: 3,433, Reputation: 596
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    #5

    May 22, 2007, 09:36 PM
    What's the harm if it makes your mom happy? But if you dead set against don't do it.. if your like whatever then do it.
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #6

    May 24, 2007, 01:16 PM
    Your post indicates you don't know much about religion. You don't have to believe in god to take part in a religious ceremony, nor will a religious ceremony magically make you believe in god. If you don't want to do it, don't. But if it will make your mom and the rest of your family happy and convince them that when you die you will make it to the pearly gates, then do it. If it's a meaningless ceremony to you, but it will make a world of difference to your family, give it some thought.
    godiva's Avatar
    godiva Posts: 47, Reputation: 4
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    #7

    Nov 15, 2007, 08:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by TheSavage
    Being christened will not make you believe in god or mean you have to believe. heck I was also christened many years ago and I am a non-believer too.
    Just try to explain to your mom that it would be a waste of water lol. -- Savage
    Cute! My niece is a wiccan but to please her mother-in-law had my great nephew christianed. I on the other hand when asked to be the godmother declined because it held no value and found it to be a waste of my time. My niece was not offended in the least because she knew I would always be a spiritual guidance to him just as I was/am to her
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #8

    Nov 15, 2007, 12:28 PM
    It would only give your mom false hopes and a false security and false image of who you are.
    I would tell her that it makes no sense to waste your time and hers to do something that has absolutely no value to you at this time and promise her if you ever do come to believe you will get christened at that time and make sure she is there for it.
    BiWiccanAndProud's Avatar
    BiWiccanAndProud Posts: 530, Reputation: 25
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    #9

    Nov 15, 2007, 02:07 PM
    It really would be a waste of time but if it makes her happy go ahead. Just explain you will still hold to your beliefs.
    margog85's Avatar
    margog85 Posts: 241, Reputation: 19
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    #10

    Nov 23, 2007, 03:38 PM
    I agree with N0help4u on this one.
    From personal experience, doing things you don't believe have significance to appease others (for whom it has GREAT significance) only leads to more problems.
    Case in point:
    When I came out of the closet 4 years ago, my conservative Catholic family freaked. My mother insisted I speak to the pastor at our church, convinced that it would help me 'straighten out' my life, so to speak. (pun intended. =P)
    Although I explained to her that it would change NOTHING and that I am who I am regardless of what a priest says to me otherwise, she still said it would make her feel better if I went. So I did, figuring that I already told her what to expect (or rather, what not to expect) and that if it made her feel better, why the heck not? It's not hurting me at all, I can tolerate 30 minutes of small talk and debate with a priest, no biggie.
    Well, the priest was much more open minded than my parents, said that 'just because the church doesn't accept homosexuality as part of god's plan for humanity right now, doesn't mean it never will. The church has been wrong in the past about things, so who's to say it's not now? God gave people free will and a conscience for a reason'
    I actually enjoyed my discussion with him, and came home in a really good mood.
    Mom asked me how it went, expecting that the hand of god reached down and saved me because I talked to a priest... despite what I told her before going- and when she heard that I was still gay, the priest didn't change me, god didn't change me, and I was still with my girlfriend...
    ... all hell broke loose. I had to leave the house that night and stay in a motel for a few weeks because of how they were acting, and I didn't feel safe in my own home.
    Now, I don't know if it'd be at that level with your situation-
    BUT
    despite what you tell people, esp when it's connected to matters of religion, they have expectations. Religion is seen as so powerful to some people that even if you tell them it's not going to change anything, they think 'well, that's what they think now. But once they do x, y, z they'll have god in their lives and start to see things differently'
    It provides them with false hope, and leads to bigger problems in the long run.
    At least in my experience.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #11

    Nov 25, 2007, 04:49 PM
    Make your mother happy. Her feelings are far more important than making a stand for atheism over this. In her heart she believes that this christening will "save you" from a life after death burning in hell for eternity. Of course, that is nonsense, but she believes it.
    margog85's Avatar
    margog85 Posts: 241, Reputation: 19
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    #12

    Nov 25, 2007, 05:03 PM
    But because she believes it, she will be all the more disappointed if you don't convert once the water and oil hit your head.

    If she's hoping for your salvation, she'll think it's in the bag once your baptised- maybe you should try to feel her out first--- if she's doing it to save your soul once your dead, then I guess there's no harm in it. But it's likely she's anticipating changes to occur while your still alive and kicking- and if you don't foresee a conversion in your future after being baptised, I'd advise against it. You'd only be building up her hopes and then letting them get smashed-

    Since that probably already happened when you told her you were an atheist and she was expecting you to be christian, why put her through that again? It's like she's asking to be put on a rollercoaster- hope and expect, just to get let down- don't allow her to do that to herself.

    It's not just about taking a stand for your beliefs- sometimes we all bend to please those we love, that's life and that's fine- but this will likely cause her more grief than happiness once she sees your still an atheist, even after you've been 'infused with the Holy Spirit' through baptism-

    Just be careful- you obviously have her best interest in mind which is awesome. Make sure that what she wants is really what's best though and that it won't make you look like even more of a lost cause in her eyes. Because that will only hurt her more. Sometimes it just takes time for parents to become accustomed to the idea that they're children aren't what they'd always expected- and eventually become okay with that.
    TheUnboundOne's Avatar
    TheUnboundOne Posts: 14, Reputation: 5
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    #13

    Dec 9, 2007, 10:53 AM
    Dear Lil101,

    Howdy, Lil101!

    I think I have a possible answer to your dilemma: Become an Ordained Minister and Christen yourself with the help of the Universal Life Church.

    Through the Universal Life Church, anyone, regardless of belief or lack of belief, can become an Ordained Minister for life, free of charge, and receive a downloadable, printable Certificate attesting to their Ministerial status.

    Simply go to the Universal Life Church Web Sites (Universal Life Church Monastery - (ULC) or Universal Life Church) and click on the tab offering ordination and follow the instructions from there. After that, you are an Ordained Minister and you can Christen yourself. You could, I suppose, even put the name you desire for your Christening on your Certificate as long as you give your present legal name.

    In addition to providing free online ordinations, the Universal Life Church also sells custom religious titles, Ministerial IDs and kits, and honorary Doctorates, all of which could bear your new self-Christened name.

    They also sell books and courses on religion, rituals, and tax law for Ministers, which could also be helpful to any work you might choose to do with your Ministry if you choose to have one.

    If it's any assurance, you'll be in good company if you become a Universal Life Church Minister. Over 20 million people worldwide have been ordained as Universal Life Church Ministers since 1959. And you'll find it is very friendly to worldly, non-believers too. Not only am I an Atheist Universal Life Church Minister, but Atheist activist Madalyn Murray O'Hair was also ordained as a Universal Life Church Minister as well. Playboy founder Hugh Hefner and multi-Billionaire Richard Branson also count themselves among Universal Life Church Ministers, along with many other notables and celebrities, so you'll be a part of a real winner's circle if you choose.

    I hope this information is very helpful and can solve your dilemma.

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