[Kevin_s]

Hello once again guys,

I know I haven't been posting lately, I've been really busy. So my girlfriend and I got back together after that little break and she says that she loves me and such but then she sort of stops saying it. I know she's not an affectionate person, and maybe I'm just paranoid because I am and I tend to look into things too much, but I don't feel I should have to say that I love her just for her to say it.

We don't really have sex as much which isn't a bad thing, and she says she just doesn't want to anymore because she feels there's better things we can be doing with our time (and I agree) and then that way when we do have sex it is better than some quickie haha.

Anyway, what I want to know is... I asked her if she is in love with me (And given we've been together almost 2 years and she said she was before) she says "We haven't been together that long, I don't know."

I'm happy that I'm with her, I really care about this girl. I want to know how I should really react to this though? I feel upset because I am in love with her and I thought she was too but now she's not sure.

I am just looking to see what others think of these typical situations and how I should feel? So far our relationship is doing all right, it's been rough because we're so stressed from work and school but we're talkin' about moving in together in the not too distant future.

Kevin S

[jolienoire]

Okay, my opinion

There is no time limit on when one should say I love you, some say it in two days, some say it in 2 years.. That doesn't matter the point is when they say it you do want it to have meaning.. As I always state you can't make people love you. All you can do is continue to express your love for her, and if and when she feels it is right she will say it.

Secondly, Sex doesn't validate love, I keep saying this because its not the quanity of the sex but the quality.. Everyday sex doesn't mean I love you, its an accesory of love.. It has to happen naturally..

Third give her time to feel where you are.. but don' t let too much time pass and you have no clarity because then you will be setting yourself up for a lot of pain to follow... If and if you feel she is not reaching your level of a potential partner then you should not settle for less either... You will only hurt yourself... SO in the meantime give her a little time to come around.. If she loves you and truly means it you will hear it..

[Kevin_s]

Thanks for the hasty reply, like I said. I don't mind not makin' love all the time, even though we're both 19, I prefer it. What I don't understand is why someone would say they are in love with me, but then take it back.

I've never "fallen out" of love, and I know I haven't done anything to hurt her in any way, shape or form.

I'm just hoping for the best, I was going to talk to her about why she isn't in love with me when she used to be, but I'd rather just leave it be and not bring on more trouble.

I really must say that I have never found anything quite like this forum, and would like to speak for most of the people on this forum when I say that I (we) appreciate everybody for giving their time and opinions to help those in the right direction.

[jolienoire]

Well, I am pretty fast at responding because I know people tend to post questions and log off, and I want to try to warrant some type of hope... How can one take back I love you? Easily answered you guys are still young, at that age we are confused.. with so many temptations out there It's hard to know what you want, but as you get older and begin to experience life and love then you will know...

In the meantime, take it one day at a time, Your still young and if she is not the one for you you may meet the one.