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RoxyB · Nov 6, 2007, 07:06 AM

I am 26, my boyfriend is 31, I have been with him for 4 1/2 years. About a year ago I started having thoughts of breaking up. I feel like I am the one in charge and I am taking care of him. I am not sure he would be OK without me there. I talked with him about what was bothering me and that I was considering breaking up. He assured me that he would do anything to keep me and to give him some time to show that.

Well, he did step up and did everything I wanted him to. However, lately I am constantly thinking about breaking up. All day, every day for the past 2 months. I am stuck 50/50 on the issue and can argue both sides very well. I have been sick for a month and my face is breaking out (which has never happened before). So the other day the issue comes to a head, and an argument escalated into him asking me if I wanted him to move out. So I said yes, I think you should. He said he would start looking for a place.

I know he doesn't have anywhere to stay, no "stuff", no experience living on his own. And to make matters much more difficult, he has an 8 yr. old son who has been a part of my life for 4+ yrs. I don't know if I am making the right decision. I just feel like we lost our way, we are bored, we are boring, and we are comfortable. I don't want to stay living together because it is easier and more comfortable. But I don't want him to move out and find a new place to stay with his son if this is a normal bump in the road for 5 yr. relationships. I am thinking that I just turned 26 and if this isn't who I should be with and I am not still "feeling it" I should let him go and move on.?

cerisa · Nov 6, 2007, 11:42 AM

Right! A good disruption will be soooo less boring. At 26 you can't think of anything other than tear it apart to fulfill yourself? Newsflash! Comfortable isn't a bad thing. Spice it up, the grass is not greener on the other side, just more effort to get to. Put that effort into your relationship.

statictable · Nov 6, 2007, 04:59 PM

You have very good thinking processes for your age and that may reflect more on your upbringing than the past 4 1/2 years.

Today this might be considered a minor bump-in-the-road but each case would vary depending on the person/s character, goals, education and background.

You have shown restraint when describing your partner; you are kind, maybe too kind.

Get a life my son. Stand up and show me if you can be responsible for yourself, a young woman and your birth child. Too young to retire but a perfect time to start living life to it's fullest. That is your choice to make as it is her choice also.