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Mzplaya719 · Oct 30, 2007, 09:05 PM

I have a son that is 2months old, his father and I have Never dated and while pregnant he stated he didn't WANT this baby, even saying the baby wasn't his.

Once my son was born, and looks just like his dad, he signed the paternity acknowledgment papers, and even moved in with me (still NOT together or Dating) with his 11 yr old daughter he has sole custody of.

We had a big fight and I want to move out of the state of NY. There is NO court order and he hasn't paid anything for child support as we don't have an order for that either.

Does he have the right to tell me I cannot move out of state with my son?

BTW He is also a marajuanna user on a daily basis and I caught him smoking it in the same room as my son. He neglects his other 3 children by not being with them and when he is he is critical and puts them down most of the time. Yet he threatens to take my son away from me because I suffer from depression and anxiety which I take medication for and go to counseling, but his mental/emotional abuse doesn't help which is why I want to move to get away from HIM and protect my SON.

PLEASE HELP!

charlotte234s · Oct 30, 2007, 09:21 PM

You need to file for full custody and also probably seek child support before you move otherwise he may seek custody later or press charges for taking the child away without permission/legal custody. I've heard things about kidnapping charges too, but I'm not sure about that. You definitely need to have court orders on custody first though.

cjonline · Oct 31, 2007, 08:59 AM

I don't think that you have to have a court order to pick up and leave, but he may file once you go. Then you either wouldn't know and he would be granted full custody and file charges against you for taking the child or you would get a life there and then be ordered to move back so he can have visitation. Then again he may do nothing. Personally I wouldn't take the chance -- I'm not sure my nerves could take the wondering if he was going to do something all the time. Contact a family law attorney and see what they say.

kanicky73 · Oct 31, 2007, 09:02 AM

I agree that I don't think you need papers to go but would suggest you get them. The risk you run is unless you can prove him completely unfit (which is very hard to do even with his marijuana use) you will probably get joint custody and then you won't be able to go without his permission.

MOMOF3SWEETHEARTS · Dec 5, 2007, 12:06 PM

I don't know if the laws are the same everywere but most states are if you were never married then the min that child was born you had custody the dad would have to file papers to get a hearing for joint costody or vistiation my brother had to go through that with his ex girlfreind they had a baby togather and she said that she wanted her new boyfriend to be the dad not him so she would not let him see the baby so he called a lawyer and they told him that she had full custody of the child because they were never married so when it was born she had custody he had to file to get partial coustdy and of course he got it but till he does that I believe that you can move and he can't do anything and even if he does it after you move then I don't think they will make you move back once you have a life set there they will just work his vistion around were both pagents live because my brothers baby lives almost 5 hours away from him and that's how it works for them