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rosaa · Oct 24, 2007, 02:23 PM

Hi everybody,

I'm new to this site. I really need some help.
Though I have read the previous posts-which I found really useful-I still have few concerns.
I have been caught shoplifting at M&S, it was my first time. I feel miserable, I feel I want to run far away. I don't know what happened to me, I'm a well educated 28 yrs old person, but somehow someway I had a fake feeling when I did it that it's not wrong and I felt sometrhing like the beginning of an addiction!
I was caught outside the door after stealing cloths worth 150 pounds, then they took me to a private room and called the manager, I felt I'd rather die then.
At first I tried to deny saying that I exchanged some cloths for these, I know it's silly but I was so ashamed to confess. Then they said we don't believe you and they will call the police unless I admitt, so I admitted, that's when they asked me for an ID with proof of address, I gave them a hospital letter which has my name, address and date of birth.
Then they told me you have to pay for these, I used my credit card.
They then gave me a trespass notice and told me that I'm not allowed to enter any branch of M&S in UK for the rest of my life and that they have my photo on the CCTV, so if I enter any M&S I will get caught and they will call the police.
I went home and I've been thinking about this for the last 4 days, I can't believe that it happened, it feels like a dream! I really hate myself for this.
What I want to know, will there be any long term consequences for this?
Will there be any record of this?
Will this be in my records if I want to apply for jobs or in any legal issue?
Will I be able to get over this by all means?
I haven't told any of the people I know, not even my family, I'm afraid I might need to enter any M&S store with them? Will I still be recognized after a long time? Even if my shape changes? Of course I won't be using my credit card, I will pay by cash if I need to.
Can someone pleasehelp me in this, I really need some help.

Rosaa

charlotte234s · Oct 24, 2007, 02:34 PM

It will stay on your record and be available to employers when you seek jobs or to legal workers in the case of future legal issues if you are convicted.

I think you should probably talk to people you care about if you feel you may have to go into a M&S Store with them, as they should understand what happened and hopefully not judge you for it, if you complete what you have to do since you've been arrested. I would probably just avoid those places if I were you, to avoid any further issues.

rosaa · Oct 24, 2007, 02:41 PM

But the police was not involved, it was settled between me and the manager of M&S, will it still be called a convection?
They said the police will not be involved this time

charlotte234s · Oct 24, 2007, 02:43 PM

If the police were not involved then no, no records will exist of it except maybe at the store. But I don't suggest going back there as the manager might not be thrilled to see you again.

rosaa · Oct 24, 2007, 02:48 PM

Thanks charlotte for your quik reply, I feel better now. Of course I won't be going back to that particular M&S. and I will do my best to avoid passing by other branches

charlotte234s · Oct 24, 2007, 02:53 PM

Good luck, and don't shoplift anymore, getting arrested for something like that is just not worth it! If you have urges to do so and can't control it, seek psychiatric help.

I'm not trying to be mean or judgmental in any way, just there are some people who have serious problems with kleptomania.

rosaa · Oct 24, 2007, 03:05 PM

It was just a mistake, and when I think now, I don't know why I did it!
I've never taken something that's not mine, but for some reason that didn't sound wrong at that time!
Of course I won't do it again, it was a nightmare by all means, I'm still shocked of what happened..

rosaa · Oct 25, 2007, 01:43 AM

Is there any possibility they will change their mind and inform the police later? And if so, is this legal?
And is there any possibility they will contact me by mail?
I became obsessed...

charlotte234s · Oct 25, 2007, 07:23 AM

It's possible but I think they would have done it then if they were going to because that's when it's easiest to prove.

rosaa · Oct 25, 2007, 11:59 PM

Well, the incident happened on Tuesday and today is Friday, the end of the week, I haven't received anything yet. Hopefully that means I won't be receiving anything.
One thing more, I'm pregnant and I think that's why they were lean with me. But the problem is that I'm in a lot of stress which I believe may affect my baby. I'm really stupid and I don't know why I did that.. I'm a good person, I shouldn't have done it.

charlotte234s · Oct 26, 2007, 12:09 AM

Honey, I don't think you have anything to worry about by now, honestly, so don't stress about it, just focus on your baby to come and congrats. Just make sure to stay out of trouble from now on! =)

rosaa · Oct 26, 2007, 12:44 AM

I'm really freaked out, I don't want anybody to know about this, I'm so ashamed..
Basically everything seemed to end when I left the store, they told me not to come again or I will be arrested, and I sometimes think that they won't bother themselves anymore thinking about me. That was all. But sometimes I get so obsessed and I get so afraid of having this nightmare following me for the rest of my life. I just want to get over. I feel so guilty, so ashamed, and everything bad.. I hope it ends.

rosaa · Oct 26, 2007, 12:45 AM

And thanks Charlotte for the support, it is really helpful