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    missiesalter2008's Avatar
    missiesalter2008 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 19, 2007, 08:47 AM
    Move out 17
    I am a 17 yr. old girl desperatly wanting to get out. Many things going on that are unhealthy for me and I have a place to go though I fear it is not what people may call "practical". Need help or advice!!
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #2

    Oct 19, 2007, 08:49 AM
    Without knowing the details its hard for us to advise. But at 17 you are still the responsibility of your parents. If you leave home you are a runaway. You can either wait until you are 18 or you can try filing for emanciation. Check with your local Family Court on what that involves.
    ordinaryguy's Avatar
    ordinaryguy Posts: 1,790, Reputation: 596
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    #3

    Oct 19, 2007, 08:57 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by missiesalter2008
    I am a 17 yr. old girl desperatly wanting to get out.
    Out of what?

    Quote Originally Posted by missiesalter2008
    Many things going on that are unhealthy for me
    What things? Unhealthy how? Physically, emotionally, sexually? Illegal?

    Quote Originally Posted by missiesalter2008
    I have a place to go though i fear it is not what people may call "practical". Need help or advice!!!
    Why is it not practical? Not safe? Not affordable?

    The more we know, the more we can help or advise.
    Gernald's Avatar
    Gernald Posts: 901, Reputation: 93
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    #4

    Oct 19, 2007, 09:08 AM
    I wouldn't recommend moving out just yet, I mean they're your parents, I'm sure they love you. And your almost 18... I know so close yet so far away.
    There is a way however, that you can. I can't remember what it's called but if you're responsible, go to school, and have a way to get money that is not illegal :-) you can do it. The only problem is a parent has to sign it. I bet you could find it on Google if you searched around a little bit.
    Sorry I can't think of the name.
    Good Luck and don't do anything rash- your almost there, and I'm sure your parents love you.
    Gernald's Avatar
    Gernald Posts: 901, Reputation: 93
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    #5

    Oct 19, 2007, 09:14 AM
    Oh I remembered... it's called being emancipated. There are other ways to go to: So You Want to "Divorce" Your Parents--A Minor's Guide to Emancipation in California - Associated Content
    missiesalter2008's Avatar
    missiesalter2008 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Oct 19, 2007, 09:57 AM
    Well, things are a little more complicated. My dad has been put in jail for sexually abusing me from 3 - 12 yrs. Of age and I am going through hell. My ma is manic depressive and highly emotional in an unhealthy way. She is an overbearing control freak and I feel like a slave more than a daughter. Mcuh more but I do not want to whine I guess you could say. It's just unhealthy for me to stay in this situation as things are getting no better. Yes, I have looked in depth about emancipation only I'm from WI. And we have no emancipation law! Thank you for the guide though I am not from CA. Plus a big problem is no way in hell would my ma who is my only parent sign for me to live outside of "her" household. She has threatened me that she will go to the ends of the earth to keep me in her control. And social services is already involved.
    MrsJoseph06's Avatar
    MrsJoseph06 Posts: 189, Reputation: 22
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    #7

    Oct 19, 2007, 10:02 AM
    Talk to your Social Service worker! They are probably your best bet to help you get out of this un-healthy situation! I'm sorry that your father did those things to you! My adopted sister's step-father did the same to her and it took a long to time to get over it but now she is an adult who has her life completely together! So there is a brighter side in sight! Do you have any where to go? If you leave your mom that is. I wish you luck in the hard road ahead of you! I hope you find some peace and happyness down the road!
    missiesalter2008's Avatar
    missiesalter2008 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Oct 19, 2007, 10:06 AM
    Yes, I am in a GREAT relationship and his ma is like my own ma and they will take me in. I am a strong, together, rational, and good person and I can handle hard times as I have gone through many. Do u think this is good enough??
    MrsJoseph06's Avatar
    MrsJoseph06 Posts: 189, Reputation: 22
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    #9

    Oct 19, 2007, 10:11 AM
    Well my sister that was adopted was in kind of the same situation as you. She was abused my her step-father for many years! She was in High school about your age when she told my parents what was going on and that they took her in! During this time she met a guy and they slept with each other right off the bat and had a up and down relationship! However, after really working on her self and there relationship they got married and have been married for 10 years now! They are super happy and have there lives together! They just had there first child! So It can happen just make sure you don't just jump unto the arms of a guy before you work on your issues and make sure he is willing to help you down that road. Are his parent willing to take you in? How far from 18 are you?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
    		  
    #10

    Oct 19, 2007, 10:38 AM
    Do NOT just move in with "his ma". Your mother can get then in big troubleif you do.

    You need to work with your caseworker on trying to deal with the issues. You don't say how long before you turn 18, but if you've toughed things out until now, you can wait a few more months.
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