[Sam_Felgen]

For Grade 9 P.E We Have To Be In A Group Or 2-6 And I've Got 5 People In Mine. We Have To Choose Music And Create A Dance For It. Since Primary School I Have Never Been Good At Group Work And Usually Fail Because I Get Stuck With The "Popular" Girls Who Always Seem To Push Me Into The Background, Never Listen To My Ideas, Don't Take Notice In Me At All And Don't Try. Already I Can See That The Group Aren't As Strong As It Used To Be And My Friends Are Fighting And Saying "She Isn't Doing Enough" Behind Their Backs. Is There Something We Can Do To Help My Friends And Me? :confused:

And How Do I Get Over Not Participating In Groups? I'm Really Stuck. We Also Have To Perform In front Of Around 35-60 Other Peers And I Feel Really Insecure About It. :(

[pdepotty1980]

Sounds like you need to lighten up on yourself a little bit! Unfortunately, no matter what level of school you are in there are always going to be "clique's". I am in the military and you can associate many aspects of the military as if you were in school.
Now, in any group(esspecially when a project is involved) it is always good to nominate a Group leader. This happens in many aspects of life I.E. Military Operations, Financial Coorperations, even things like Commercials. When these people are presented these kinds of situations, usually major decissions are left up to one person. Of course input from other members is always good, but the final thoughs(good or bad) need to be left to the Leader. This allows for praise to be given for success, or blame to be placed for failure.
Now, sometimes there is a person in a group that has natural leadership skills and will kind of full this spot without an official nomination. Unless you feel you are better suited for the job, let yourself be cought up in the flow of things, and use the things you are good at to better the group effort. Remember, not everone can be the Quarterback. Someone has to be the Kicker, if you get what I am saying.
When it comes to you feeling uncomfortable working in groups, everyone has something they are good at... EVERYONE! When you work in a group and you believe that you are going to be the weakest link, say it to the group. So at least the group can move forward with a better understanding of everyone's capabilities. If you are well suited for the position at hand, take charge and don't let someone push you out of the way. Confidence is without a doubt you best ally in this kind of situation. --If you try to take charge of a group and diliberate too long people will question your ability. WHen you step up to the plate, make a decition and STICK TO IT.-- No team ever gets better if they never lose. Loseing sucks yes... but it lets you know where your weakness lies. Embrace this and you will be well on your way to conquering you fear. Good luck on your project. And if you make a suggestion and they try to blow you off, continue to make it and eventually they will listen, sure the group might think you are an "A"hole or a... but if the group is successful "who cares" right!!