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The Lake House · Oct 7, 2007, 07:03 PM

Do men value women's kindness, purity and success?

Or you men don't care about it...

Ash123 · Oct 7, 2007, 07:19 PM

Of course... but being physically attracted too is important as well.

The Lake House · Oct 7, 2007, 07:22 PM

What if she is a beautiful cow but doesn't give them the milk...

Ash123 · Oct 7, 2007, 07:38 PM

no sex?

Well, how old are you? I think a guy will wait if he is:

1) in High School
2) shares your same values and wants to get married one day.
3) you are really hot and he thinks you all can do "it" one day

being good at oral can be satisfying to him as well.

GeniusfromGeniusHell · Oct 7, 2007, 07:47 PM

Originally Posted by The Lake House

Do men value women's kindness, purity and success?

Or you men don't care about it...

Kindess, yes. Absolutely. In fact kindness is #1 for me.

Purity, no. Purity is an abstract that only exists in your head. If a guy prefers you to be a virgin, then he is sexually immature or dysfunctional in some way.

Success. Sure, if it contributes to your happiness.

GeniusfromGeniusHell · Oct 8, 2007, 03:00 AM

Originally Posted by The Lake House

What if she is a beautiful cow but doesn't give them the milk...

Then it is like a photograph of a bag full of money.

Sad Soul · Oct 8, 2007, 11:42 AM

Originally Posted by GeniusfromGeniusHell

Purity is an abstract that only exists in your head.

I really like this point. I think I always thought this, but you put this into words for me. Thank you so much.

Anyway, yeah guys can love all those things, but they can just as easily respect and love a woman who, for example, isn't pure
Or we can throw another characteristic out there, like being pretty.

It all depends on your outlook on people and life.

And the characteristics you pointed out were great. If a man doesn't like them, a woman should walk away proud, and knowing something better's to come.

Ash123 · Oct 8, 2007, 12:09 PM

I am being overly simplistic, but without more facts "Lake House" it's hard to comment exactly in regards to such things as:

1) your age?
2) the lifestyle of the man in question
3) your values
4) your dating history

The Lake House · Oct 8, 2007, 12:12 PM

1. 28
2. simliar to me, he is a virgin as well, 30 yr-old. His family (includes himself) are very traditional and religious.
3. similar to his. He has a very high dating standards so do I. Morals come first. Kindess, achievement... both of us are very family oriented. that's important for both of us.
4. very few, so is his.
Edited-both of us have many admirers back in the old days, but we were both focusing on career and self-improvement instead of chasing fun.
We enjoy the same books, share similar interest, both busy with work but we make time for each other.

Leidenschaftlich für Wahr · Oct 8, 2007, 12:20 PM

AWW that's so cute! You sound really good for each other! And yes, if he has any sense of moral value then yes he will value YOU for being a virgin. He is a Christian, yes? Well religious anyway Im guessing.
Yes, he will admire your purity, as long as you keep it firm in his head that you are serious about it :)

Sad Soul · Oct 8, 2007, 12:36 PM

Originally Posted by The Lake House

1. 28
2. simliar to me, he is a virgin as well, 30 yr-old. His family (includes himself) are very traditional and religious.
3. similar to his. He has a very high dating standards so do I. Morals come first. Kindess, achievement...both of us are very family oriented., that's important for both of us.
4. very few, so is his.
edited-both of us have many admirers back in the old days, but we were both focusing on career and self-improvement instead of chasing fun.
We enjoy the same books, share similar interest, both busy with work but we make time for each other.

So what is the problem exactly? Why the sad face?

Ash123 · Oct 8, 2007, 03:31 PM

So, are you beginning to question your partner?

Or do you think only he values your values?

I would say the majority of men value the traits you asked about... especially in a wife.
And even if their relationship is intimate they do as well.

Ash123 · Oct 8, 2007, 06:42 PM

Ok, I just read your ages....

I would hardly say you have abstained... In fact you are not even legal.
I am glad you have values, but at this point: MARRIAGE and SEX should be
about 3rd on your list anyway, after:

1) School
2) School
3) School

and... well, you get the idea.

Get good grades. Get into college. Get some life eperience. Maybe you will go to the same school - maybe not.
But your career and life survival skills will be next on your list: 4)

Cheers.

Ash123 · Aug 23, 2009, 09:10 PM

Leidenschaftlich für Wahr,

This question was posted two years ago and you are now putting a RED DISAGREE on my post?! I would reconsider that perhaps for a couple reasons:

1. the poster edited age and question
2. the poster thanked me in the end anyway
3. it was... 2 Years Ago and out of context...

talaniman · Aug 24, 2009, 08:42 AM

Cultures may differ as to what are good qualities in partners or mates, but for me, its how well we get along, and how deep the commitment is.

An ugly cow, can have great milk. So can a dumb one.

Purity is in the eye of the beholder, and a masters degree doesn't mean you will be compatible, or successful together.

Eye candy is great in a mirror, but happiness is great all the time.

kindness, purity and success?

All that stuff looks good on paper, but reality is where it needs to work. That takes a deeper look.