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8259 · Oct 6, 2007, 08:59 AM

There is this married guy that has been flirting with me about a month after he was hired.I'ts been a year and a half since He's been hired, and He's still flirting with me.The prolem is I've fallen in love with Him,and I Don't know how to get rid of these feeling since I see Him everyday.Also. His Wife became pregnant,and He still has not stopped flirting with Me.I'm just wondering what is going on in His mind to continue Flirting with His Wife being Pregnant. Help!

Sad Soul · Oct 6, 2007, 05:39 PM

If he's continuing the flirting, then something is giving him the green light to do so.

I wonder what that could be? Please give me some details about this.

shygrneyzs · Oct 6, 2007, 05:49 PM

The details to this story would be that the OP never told him to "knock it off" and by not telling to go and mind his own business, he was encouraged and continued his attentions. What a pig this guy is - his wife is pregnant and he is out trying to spread his charms.

Of course, I do not have many kind thoughts for someone who knowingly allows a married man to flirt with her at work (or anywhere else for that matter). You wonder what is going on in this guy's mind? SEX! What else? It's not a cup of coffee at Starbucks. Hope you wake up and tell this guy to leave you alone and to go home to help his pregnant wife.

Fr_Chuck · Oct 6, 2007, 05:53 PM

I would say, stop that, or I will tell your wife,
If that does not stop him, report him to HR.

8259 · Oct 7, 2007, 07:30 AM

I have to add that I know that these feelings I have for this guy is wrong,but you just can't turn feelings on and off. If you really care for him.how can I see him every day feeling this way,and maybe he's just the type of Guy who likes to flirt . I would definitely like a guys point of view.

J_9 · Oct 7, 2007, 07:32 AM

I have merged your second post with your first. Please keep them all together as to avoid confusion.

Sad Soul · Oct 7, 2007, 07:36 AM

Originally Posted by 8259

i have to add that i know that these feelings i have for this guy is wrong,but you just can't turn feelings on and off. if you really care for him.how can I see him every day feeling this way,and maybe he's just the type of Guy who likes to flirt . i would definitely like a guys point of view.

No one said to magically turn your feelings off, but people are saying to not act upon your feelings.

For example, married men find women attractive all the time, and this is okay, but should they act on these feelings? No! Unless they are animals of course.

Animals act on their feelings. Human beings are suppose to be tame. For example, when we hate someone, are we suppose to shoot them or hurt them physically? No.
See, you can still have those feelings of hate, but the right thing to do when you hate someone, is to NOT act on those feelings.

The same goes when you are saying you have feeling for a man who is married and his wife is pregnant. Sometimes this happens, but you have to be mature enough to not act on it and you have to be adult enough to not encourage this dishonest behavior.

One more thing: you say you care for him, but believe me he doesn't really care about you. Even if he tells you one day that he loves you, trust that he does not know what really "caring" for someone is. You know why? BECAUSE HE PROBABLY SAYS HE CARES for his pregnant partner that he married, yet he flirts with you behind her back... So does he really know what caring is? He also is putting you in this position... so does he think much of you too? Nah. He doesn't know how to think much of a woman.

shygrneyzs · Oct 7, 2007, 07:36 AM

You could have turned those feelings off at day one. Wrote him off your book as he is married. You could have told him that you do not wish his attentions and that would have been that. Are you not the one in charge of yourself? Act responsibly towards this situation and not blame your hormones.

lily_678 · Oct 7, 2007, 07:36 AM

First try to confince yourself that you should not be with him he has a wife and is going to be a father imagne how much it would hurt you if your husbend or boyfriend was cheating on you. Second tell him you're not intrested in him he's got a job and he should do it right without interfring with other women.