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crystal2541 · Oct 2, 2007, 07:57 AM

I was wondering if my husband could sign over his rights to his daughter and not pay child support. His ex wife will not allow him to see her. Yes she signed a visitation agreement. And I know that she is in contempt of court. We do not have the money to take her to court. We are a poor family that lives on less than a 1,000 a month. We have tried legal aid but they had to many cases to help us out. I talked to her yesterday and she told me that her boyfriend is her daughters father and that my husband was just a sperm donor. And we do have a son and I wanted my son to know his sister. But she is not going for it. She said she doesn't want her daughter going through two families. She is basically still mad that he left her 2 years ago. He really doesn't want to sign over his rights. But they are taking money out of our family for a child that we are never going to be able to see. Is there any loop holes in taking her to court? Please I need all the advice I can get. We don't have any money to do anything is there anything we can do that doesn't cost money?I am from Ohio

lsreally · Oct 2, 2007, 08:07 AM

I know that in Ohio they have a program that you can sign up for if you are under a certain financial quota. It will help with the filing fees. Legal aid never wants to deal with custody and visitation cases because they are ongoing. It is unfortunate because you expect them to help families in need due to money issues. I would suggest your husband go down and file for visitation again. When he gets a court date he needs to let them know that the mother has denied him his visitation rights. Just because he pays child support does not mean he has visitation rights. Also have him ask the courts to appoint a guardian ad litem. This person is a lawyer for the child. She/he can enforce the visitation if that's what your husband wants. Now if he wants to sign over his parental rights completely because of the situtation he can do that. I don't know if all staes are the same but some will terminate the child support order if the absent parent gives all rights away. If at all talk to a lawyer in your state. I would suggest finding one that will not charge you just to listen to your situation. Sometimes they give good advice for free.

ScottGem · Oct 2, 2007, 08:11 AM

You don't need an attorney (though it would help), you can file a petititon in court to have the ex cited for contempt of court if she refuses to abide by the visitation order.

But no, you cannot relinquish rights just to get out of child support.

crystal2541 · Oct 2, 2007, 09:14 AM

I need to know what the programs are called to help. I have searched and searched and I am not finding any.

GlindaofOz · Oct 2, 2007, 09:18 AM

Originally Posted by crystal2541

I need to know what the programs are called to help. I have searched and searched and I am not finding any.

As ScottGem said your husband will not be able to sign off on parental rights to get out of paying child support. Signing away rights is a very complicated process and usually there has to be someone else willing to adopt the child after the rights are signed away. Even though he signs over his rights without someone willing to adopt he will still have to pay support.

Why not petition the court to lower payments if that's the problem?

crystal2541 · Oct 2, 2007, 09:25 AM

They are taking the lowest amount out right now. 200.00 they take out. It might not sound like a lot but it is for us. I mean she is the one saying that my husband is not her father and she even said that her boyfriend his her father and he supports her. I have it in my email. I need to know how we can see her. Something that doesn't cost a lot of money. We would rather see her than not. But that lady won't let us. She is doing this because she is mean. She said that he abandoned her. No he didn't we didn't even have a car to see her.

macksmom · Oct 2, 2007, 09:44 AM

One option to do is have your husband call the local police station, or anyone associated with the courts and tell them he has a child support order that the mother is not complying to. They will escort him to the house during the designated vistation time. Now, keep in mind, they cannot force her to release the child to your husband. What they will do though, is show her the visitation order and inform her that she is in contempt of a court order. That might scare her enough to allow visitation. If she still refuses the officer, or whoever you have escort him, will be witness that she out right acknowledged the court order and went against it. That will play highly in his favor.

You also can file petitions on your own, without an attorney... however this is very time consuming and you may miss things you are supposed to file, plus you will still have to pay filing fees... but it is much less expensive than an attorney. You can visit your courthouse in your area and talk to them about what papers you need to file. Getting an attorney just ensures everything is filed correctly and all the information is there.

And as everyone has said... no he can't sign away his rights to get out of child support, that would only apply if the mother had a husband to adopt the child.

s_cianci · Oct 2, 2007, 07:08 PM

You can always go to court without an attorney. It sounds like a fairly cut-and-dry case of contempt. You can also file a motion to have the child support amount modified (i.e. lowered) since he has a son that he is also responsible for supporting (unless this was already taken into consideration when the initial order was established.)

Fr_Chuck · Oct 2, 2007, 07:28 PM

I am sorry macksmom not sure where you live, but in at least 12 states I know of , the police laugh at you and tell you it is a civil issue, they will not go with you on a visitation and do not inforce child visit orders.

If the one parent refuses, all you can do is file in court to hold them in contempt.

But as everyone is telling you, signing over his rights does not take away his child support, unless the mothers new partner is willing to adopt.
But she wants that 200 a month and she wants to rub it in that you can't see the child.

tawnynkids · Oct 2, 2007, 08:07 PM

This appears to be the form you may need to file and serve against her, check and see:http://www.domesticcourt.org/Resourc...Show_Cause.pdf http://www.domesticcourt.org/Resourc..._Affidavit.pdf
Actually here is the web site, if this is where you would need to file then I would check everything out on this site it contains a lot of information: Domestic Relations Court - Clermont County

I found this regarding services provided when you can't afford an attorney:http://www.ohiolegalservices.org/OSL...egal+Education

A link for legal help which you can possibly find some pro bono assistance (gotta do some digging): Find Ohio Legal Help

A link on information for enforcing an order: http://www.ohiolegalservices.org/OSL...egal+Education

And link to the Ohio Law Library with a ton of info: Family Law
And some information on representing yourself: http://www.ohiolegalservices.org/OSL...egal+Education
I hope some of it helps.

macksmom · Oct 3, 2007, 05:06 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

I am sorry macksmom not sure where you live, but in at least 12 states I know of , the police laugh at you and tell you it is a civil issue, they will not go with you on a visitation and do not inforce child visit orders.

I am in Ohio. And I know for a fact (from personal experience) it is done here.

It is not about "enforcing"... the police cannot force the mother to give the child over, they serve as witness that there is a court order, and the mother is going against that court order. They physically cannot do anything. They serve as a creditable witness.

Guess it just depends on weather law enforcement in different states choose to be helpful or not.

Fr_Chuck · Oct 3, 2007, 05:43 AM

Well from my personal experience, what they do is come when the person in the house calls, and arrests the man at the door for tresspassing for trying to see the kids,

In fact in training classes we are told not to get involved, it is not our place or duty.

macksmom · Oct 3, 2007, 05:57 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Well from my personal experience, what they do is come when the person in the house calls, and arrests the man at the door for tresspassing for trying to see the kids,

In fact in training classes we are told not to get involved, it is not our place or duty.

And like I said, it may be on a state-to-state basis, and how helpful the police are where you live.

Fr_Chuck · Oct 3, 2007, 06:04 AM

Of course never said it was not, and I am sure in some areas even where police are not suppose to, some may.

Nicole98 · Oct 9, 2007, 08:47 AM

Originally Posted by crystal2541

I was wondering if my husband could sign over his rights to his daughter and not pay child support. His ex wife will not allow him to see her. Yes she signed a visitation agreement. And I know that she is in contempt of court. We do not have the money to take her to court. We are a poor family that lives on less than a 1,000 a month. We have tried legal aid but they had to many cases to help us out. I talked to her yesterday and she told me that her boyfriend is her daughters father and that my husband was just a sperm donor. And we do have a son and I wanted my son to know his sister. but she is not going for it. She said she doesn't want her daughter going through two families. She is basically still mad that he left her 2 years ago. He really dosnt want to sign over his rights. but they are taking money out of our family for a child that we are never going to be able to see. Is there any loop holes in taking her to court? please I need all the advice I can get. We dont have any money to do anything is there anything we can do that doesn't cost money?I am from Ohio

Yes file a motion against her for visitation. You don't need a lawyer you can represent yourself . As long as your boyfriend is stable and not into any drugs they will grant him visits with his child. She either obeys the laws and follows rules or they will hold her in contempt and she could lose custody of her.

vacanteyes · Oct 21, 2007, 01:18 PM

Regarding the contempt of court order, Fr. Chuck is right {at least in California} the police do nothing, HOWEVER if/when you do go to court for contempt you have legal proof that it happened. Unfortunately I went through visitation issues with my ex and he denied visitation 10 times, I am intelligent {and poor} and it was cut and dry contempt so I filed the papers and represented myself. He got an attorney and she annihilated me in court, I was even ordered to pay HER attorney fees {which I paid in pennies}. I saved my money and 18 months later I retained an attorney returned to court and the bailiff arrested him and took him off to jail right there, 5 days of jail for each count of contempt. Of course I felt like a jerk and still hate that it had to go that far, I just remember how many tears I cried when he denied my children from me.