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lizard20 · Sep 29, 2007, 04:03 PM

Under the courts law how far away can he take my child on visitation his name is not on the birth certificate and the baby going to have my last name I need to know how long he can be with my baby to we haven't went to court yet he doesn't want to go to court he just wants to write an agreement I don't know what to do thanks

Fr_Chuck · Sep 29, 2007, 04:07 PM

If he is proven to be the father by DNA tests or by you agreeing he is the father, he can get up to joint custody, which means he gets the child 1/2 of the time. The name on the birth certificate and last name of the child has no bearing at all on his rights to joint custody or visitation.

He can get several weeks of visits in the summer with rights to take the child on vacation, to his home out of state and so on.

And you have to go to court, there has to be a legal order of custody by the court, and a set child support by the court, and specific visitation by the court. Of course he does not want to go to court, he does not want court ordered child support.

s_cianci · Sep 30, 2007, 10:04 AM

Any agreement that you and he would write on your own wouldn't be worth the paper it'd be written on. You'd really be wise to go to court. The judge could then address all the issues you've raised in your questions and it'd be legal and binding.

shygrneyzs · Sep 30, 2007, 10:31 AM

Go to court and spare yourself years of grief. Doing something on a piece of paper, well, the saying goes that one can use that piece of paper for toilet paper - that is how legal it is.

Having this whole issue of child support and visitation is a protection not just for you, but also for your child. If something happens, then there is legal recourse. A piece of paper? Not too likely. If you feel he is pressuring you, ALL the more reason to go to court. Don't be intimidated.

lsreally · Sep 30, 2007, 11:55 AM

Every state has different visitation laws. At the fact that he is not declared the father through DNA or birth certificate he does not have many rights when it comes to when and where he takes the child. If you have not yet gone to court regarding visitation you need to set the rules. If he breaks them you have control to decide if he gets to see the child. This is a situation where you only have two options. Go through the courts (which will make things more structured) or deal with it on your own (which causes a huge headache).