[nkychic]

Ok, I wrote this looong drawn out question/story and deleted it. I just want to be short and simple... is it wrong to have friends who are the opposite sex when you are in a relationship? If both people in the relationship pursue these friendships, does it make it 'more right'? Where do you draw the line? I'm more "one of the guys". I always have been. I work at a place with NO other female on the floor (not including the offices) and prefer it that way. I don't work well with women, I don't get along well with them. I don't act the way other girls my age do or like the same things. I don't care about getting my nails done and it irritates me when people vacuum while I try to watch the game =). On top of that, I've moved around all my life. Making friends quickly is something I've gotten pretty good at, had no choice. Is it wrong that I've made "guy friends" since I've been in this relationship? Is it OK since I've never lied about them. I'm always honest with my boyfriend as to who I'm with and where. I just want some help as to where the boundaries are.

[GlindaofOz]

I don't think there is anything wrong with having friends of the opposite sex. Has your boyfriend meant all of these guys? It more then likely is a territory thing. Men can feel insecure when they see their lady surrounded by guys all the time. I'm sure no matter what you say all he is thinking is that all of these guy want to be my girlfriend and given the chance they would all jump. Or he may believe there are some secret romantic pasts or something. I think that the more the boyfriend sees you interact with these guys and sees that its more like brother and sister relationships he will chill out.

[bushg]

I would say if you were upfront with him from the beginning he should not feel slighted. He needs to get over it and let you be who you are. Maybe he is not the right person for you if he is trying to change you.

[nkychic]

I apologize, but I must have written something in an accusing manner. He honestly doesn't seem to have a problem with it. I laid everything out on the table in the first place, I get along better with guys. That's actually what he always said he loved so much about me. I'm not the girl that gets mad cause he won't take her shopping, but instead I throw the "football sunday" parties and buy season tickets. I just really wanted to know so that I knew I wasn't putting him in an unfair spot. I just don't want him to feel like he can't be honest (because the couple serious relationship I had ended because of these reasons) about the way he feels. But I think you both answered that. I think he IS being honest. There are in fact people out there who can fully trust. I guess you all helped me to realize I am pretty lucky. Who would have known in just a few responses =) Thanks you all...

<3 Leslie

[GlindaofOz]

Oh okay. Well that's good then. Yes I think you are being totally fair to him. Would it be any different if you spent every Sunday going to lunch then getting mani/pedis with the girls? I don't think so.

Always glad to help :)

[Jiser]

Nothing wrong at all with different sex friends. In some cases though there is allways that sexual tension in the air, it just depends on if you act on it - usually if your drunk. In most cases myself when I get to know a member of the opposite sex i.e. Working with them, I would never ever want to even think about anything but friendship.

[RaineAndrews]

Its okay... as long as you're not emotionally cheating on your boyfriend, which it sounds like you aren't. Just make sure you aren't telling these guys your problems, that is a job meant for your man :D