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all4lex · Sep 9, 2007, 03:56 PM

My brother is in a relationship with a girl that he has never married. They have a 2 year old daughter together. He is extremely unhappy in the relationship. He has career in a job that he has schooling for. The mother does not work. She is a stay at home mother whom I don't believe even has her drivers license. He owns the house rightfully without the mother. When he suggests they split up the mother threatens to move out of state to live with her family & that he won't see his daughter. He wants to have custody of his daughter. The mother has a house her father owns here in the same state that she can live in. There is no reason other than spite to move out of state. How does my brother go about being the guardian and residential parent? He is willing to give the mother visitation but my niece is much better off living with her father. He is the much more stable and responsible parent. Please help. This is a sort of an emergency!! It would be the sooner the better to let my niece be in a less stressful situation.
Thanks

Fr_Chuck · Sep 9, 2007, 04:18 PM

First it is hard still in the US for the father to get principle custody. It is more possible to get joint custody. During the custody battle.

So he hires an attorney and files for custody and from there see what happens,

spongebobwifey93 · Sep 9, 2007, 04:26 PM

Originally Posted by all4lex

My brother is in a relationship with a girl that he has never married. They have a 2 year old daughter together. He is extremely unhappy in the relationship. He has career in a job that he has schooling for. The mother does not work. She is a stay at home mother whom I don't believe even has her drivers license. He owns the house rightfully without the mother. When he suggests they split up the mother threatens to move out of state to live with her family & that he won't see his daughter. He wants to have custody of his daughter. The mother has a house her father owns here in the same state that she can live in. There is no reason other than spite to move out of state. How does my brother go about being the guardian and residential parent? He is willing to give the mother visitation but my niece is much better off living with her father. He is the much more stable and responsible parent. Please help. This is a sort of an emergency!!!!! It would be the sooner the better to let my niece be in a less stressful situation.
Thanks

Wow!seems to me that the mother is being a little selfish.But I would suggest that the mother,the father,and the child have a descussion to see what the child wants.cause after all even though she is very young,her decision should count @ least 30%.court could help also.

J_9 · Sep 9, 2007, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by spongebobwifey93

cause after all even though she is very young,her descision should count @ least 30%.court could help aslo.

I'm sorry, but a 2 year old does not have the cognitive ability to make such a life altering decision. Heck, she's going to pick the parent who is more fun and takes her to McDonald's more!

This man needs to hire a family law attorney who will fight for him. Fathers getting custody is not anywhere near as hard as it was 20 or even 10 years ago. It is much more common now. Until that time he needs to document, document, document.

all4lex · Sep 9, 2007, 04:31 PM

My niece is only 2 years old. I have seen my brother with her and even if I didn't know him I would say he is an amazing father. I know that she would want to stay with both of the parents as would most children. My main concern here is that my brother does not want to be with this woman anymore and if he leaves her she has made it clear she will leave the state & live with her family there. I think it's a way to make him stay with her but I don't want him to lose her. So for now he's been living an unhappy relationship life to be able to be with his daughter. He thinks he has no rights. They have never been married so Im assuming that the mother has automatic guardianship. Can she take her? What should he do??

J_9 · Sep 9, 2007, 04:33 PM

He needs to get a family law attorney. If he is on the birth certificate he has rights. If he isn't on the birth certificate he needs a paternity test.

HE DOES HAVE RIGHTS!!

s_cianci · Sep 10, 2007, 03:29 PM

Your brother needs to file a motion for custody in Family Court. A lawyer can help him with this.

JudyKayTee · Aug 31, 2008, 07:02 AM

Originally Posted by e cregan

my daughtwr is 6 and don,t want to be with her dad as he stays nasty things to her and causes trouble with me what can i do

Go to Court and get the visitation changed - present your proof to the Judge and ask for supervised visitation or no visitation.

(I assume you have a visitation/support order - ?)

GV70 · Aug 31, 2008, 11:01 AM

There is one very important principle in American Family Law-"The money goes to the child,the child does not go to the money".Much money does not mean much responsibility.
If they have never been married-the mother has sole custody until the judge says different...