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Jackie_921 · Sep 7, 2007, 07:27 AM

Well this is how it goes.

Me and my husband used to go to high school together year never dated until 3 years after I graduated. We bumped into one another and he seemed like he changed from high school. The thing is he was such a "player" back in high school but I figured that he changed. We ended up getting pregnant 3 months later and married soon after. Everything was great. I love him a lot and did not think things will go bad.

Well I caught my husband searching for exes on the computer and saw that he emailed people on the internet trying to go out on dates. It goes back to like 2 weeks after we got married. Then I caught him again trying to take out one of his exes to the movies. Now he denies ever going out with them. He says he is nothing but game and trying to see if he still has it. I now want nothing to do with him. I actually do not even want to be touched by him.

I have lost a ton a weight since having my son and the compliments have been pouring in. I now see I still am attracting others. I do not know what to do. I really love his family and scared that if I leave him that every relationship after that will fail. What should I do?
Stay with someone who has been sneaking behind my back? True I have not caught him actually "cheating" but he has been searching! I don't know! I just don't trust him and I don't know if I love him still.

jackie223 · Sep 7, 2007, 07:40 AM

Its not you, it doesn't matter if you gained weight, lost weight, its him.. it usually happens to the good looking girls I don't know why just like the nice guys always get the girls that walk all over them... if A MAN IS Going to CHEAT ITS NOT BECAUSE THE WOMEN AT HOME Doesn't LOOK GOOD OR TREAT THEM GOOD,MOST OF THE TIME THE CHEATING MAN HAVE IT WAY TO GOOD AT HOME, THEY JUST WANT Their CAKE AND EAT IT TOO

LearningAsIGo · Sep 7, 2007, 10:27 AM

Ask him to see a marriage counselor with you. He may not have acutally cheated at this point, but he's looking outside the marriage and not being 100% truthful. He may bulk at the idea, but if he wants you to trust him again, this may be the only way around it.

Try before you leave him, or you may regret it later.

tobeamiss · Sep 7, 2007, 08:52 PM

I just don't trust him and I don't know if I love him still.

I think you should find out first if you still love him, and if that love is strong enough to work through this.

br_hjs · Sep 7, 2007, 08:57 PM

I think that if you can't trust him and he's searching for other people that he shouldn't be with you. You deserve a lot better... no one wants someone like him. If you leave him he'll learn that when he's alone the rest of his life. Well, not with anyone who's really in love with him anyway. Let his family know how you feel and why you don't want to talk to him. Just tell them what he did and see what they say about it. Maybe you can still talk with them