[GlindaofOz]

I think we all saw this coming. It was either going to be you or her who made the first move. Let us know how everything goes.

[VADawg]

I'm almost tempted to call her and tell her that I don't think it's going to work out and we should just be friends again. That we're both going to be too busy to have a relationship. I don't want to get dumped again.

[GlindaofOz]

Then why don't you?

Here is Ash's breaking up guide:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ghlight=Ash123

[VADawg]

You know... we had A LOT more fun just being friends. That's all I really want at this time anyway. I'll call her and basically say "Hey...I need to talk and I think you saw this coming...but it's just not working out. We're both too busy for a relationship and it's pretty obvious. I'd rather just be friends."

I'm not even sad. That's pretty telling of how it was going.

[GlindaofOz]

You deserve to be happy in your life and if having her as your girlfriend doesn't make you feel happy then you need to do what you need to do to feel good.

[VADawg]

She's not answering her phone... great. I'm glad she's acting so mature about this.

[talaniman]

Dawg, I've been following your threads for a while, and do feel your pain, but I think for now you have to be selfish, and look out for yourself. Take some time for you, and do something to vent those feelings, and let the emotional dust settle. There is no more talking that can change anything, but by stepping back, and leaving it alone you can come to terms with this latest setback. Do as she is doing don't answer the phone. Not as a game, but to give you the time you deserve to put things in perspective. Do this for you.

[VADawg]

But don't you think I should call and ask her what's the deal with her myspace page? I mean, I knew it was heading in that direction, but I'd like to talk to her about it and see what's up.

[talaniman]

This has become a real dumb game, and a disrespectful one at that. She isn't answering her phone, so what are you going to do call all evening. Take a break from this useless drama, and be selfish and let her let you know how she feels, when she gets hold of you. Be unavailable and let the dust settle and end this on your terms not hers. Why do you guys insist on running behind a female with your nose up her butt! It makes no sense.

[VADawg]

I didn't leave a message or anything but she has caller ID so she knows I called. I guess she can call me if she really wants to. I'm almost at a loss of what I'd even say to her.

But last night I didn't call her like she wanted me to. Could that be why she broke up with me? If it is, then wow, what a ridiculous reason. Could she not be calling me back as "payback" for not calling her? Talk about immature.

The thing is... we're both going to the same school in the Fall. I was supposed to drive her everyday. I wonder if she actually expects that to happen now. I guess I'll just let it unfold and see what happens. I have no clue what to do and if I should call or not. I'm just really curious to know what her reasoning behind this breakup was.

[GlindaofOz]

Dude, not your problem. If she was planning on staying with you to catch ride every day that's pretty ridiculous. Not your problem anymore I'm pretty sure she will find way she can find someone else to catch a ride with, take a bus, a taxi, ride a bike heck ride a magical unicorn to school for all you care. NOT YOUR PROBLEM. DO NOT LET HER GUILT YOU.

Also my guess is that she was not getting her way and she had a hissy fit and acted like a petulent child and decided to end everything. Count your lucky starts on this one Dawg.

[VADawg]

The thing is, I don't want to end our friendship over this. Before our relationship, we were GREAT friends. We talked about everything. We hung out all the time. It's just when we talked to each other everyday that it became stale for her apparently.

I'm just so tempted to call her right now though. I really want to find out what her reasons were for the breakup. Her home phone has caller ID so I'm sure she knows I called... but still, you never know. You think I should just wait for her to call Glinda? I'm wondering if she's ignoring me because I didn't call last night.

[GlindaofOz]

Let it go. I believe that she is playing a game with you. Do whatever you have to do to not call her. If necessary go put your phone out in the car for the night that way to call her takes time and mental effort on your part. What she wants you to do is desperately call her all night long so she can ignore you and feel like she has the power in the relationship

I want you to realize that there is a chance here that she will not want to continue the friendship. We advise people on here all the time to cut off all contact from the ex in order to heal and to be able to move on. You can go back to being friends once you are over the ex but not before that.

Did you read through all of Ash's posts? It is really helpful.

[VADawg]

I've just got people telling me to call and others not to. My parents are saying I should call and find out what's wrong. I did only call once and there's no guarantee she got my call... but I don't know. This is so confusing.

I went through no contact the first time she broke up with me so I know how it is. Honestly, I don't think I need to do it this time around. I'm not sad about this, I'm just baffled that she'd take the route she did. Why not just call me and tell it to me that way?

I haven't read Ash's posts... but I will.

I'm sorry if I'm talking in circles, but this whole situation is a mess and I don't know what to think.

[GlindaofOz]

You are just trying to talk it out - nothing wrong with that.

I would wait and try her again tomorrow or give her the weekend. Nothing is going to be accomplished tonight. You have a lot to process and just try to let it sink in. Figure out what's best for you to do. You already know this isn't what you want and I'm sure its frustrating because you can't complete your steps. Patience is the key here I guess.

[VADawg]

You're right. I'll just give it some time and call her back tomorrow if she doesn't. I have a feeling she won't so it'll probably be me. If she doesn't answer tomorrow, then I guess I'll just move on and live my life. The relationship wasn't going to work in the first place so I have no reason to fret over it. But if you were to break up with someone, wouldn't you have the guts to call them or meet up with them in person? That's what I don't get here. I know the first thing I would do is call them.

[GlindaofOz]

One thing I've learned in my life that when you expect people to act the way you would you will more often then not be disappointed. You would call her and say hey here's what's going on she would rather change her status to single and avoid your calls. If that's how she wants then that's how it is. You can't make her talk to you and if she refuses your calls oh well time for you to start moving on.

[VADawg]

I know not everyone thinks the same, but a mature person would do what I would.

Hopefully it works itself out. I hate being in feuds with people. I'm just not the kind of person to deal with them well. I always want to settle things immediately. This is probably why not knowing what her reasons were for breaking up is bothering me so much.

[talaniman]

I understand your confusion, but as long as you worry about what she is doing and why yo will be confused as to what you should do. That's the point she is acting like a real young beetch and your thinking about being her friend. Those days are over ad you need to act like a man and not put up with her shat, plain and simple. She must find out you will not tolerate being treated this way, and the second time around at that. Even talking at this point would be the act of a wimp, and that sir is very unattractive, and unhealthy. Reread your own threads for all the proof you need.

[VADawg]

I just want to call to find out what happened... but on the other hand, I really don't even want to know. I'm more upset today than I was last night. I think if I did get ahold of her I'd just start going off on a tangent. Maybe it's best I just forget about it all and do my own thing. If she really wants to contact me, she can be a big girl and do it.