[Cherubael]

I've never posted on a site like this or really stated my feelings like this before, but I need to find some outlet before I go crazy(er).

At the moment my life seems like a living hell. I know others have it worse than I do, but really knowing that doesn't help too much.

I have two young children and a loving girlfriend, the problem is they are on the other side of the country to where I am now. I had moved to live with them a year ago, but shortly after lost my job. This led to a great deal of stress and tension between myself and my girlfriend, eventually in me beign forced to return to my childhood home, to parents in the middle of a divorce.

My father has always treated me fairly badly, never giving me support and I stupidly turned to him for help. Now I'm stuck living in a house where my presence is barely tolerated and dealing with near daily verbal abuse from my father.

I desperately want to leave, but leaving means giving up my job, which means no money to support my children, or even to pay for the trainfare to see them.

So at the moment my situation is pretty much one of misery. I spend every waking moment wishing I was home with my children, dreading returning to my fathers house, but knowing that I can't afford to lose my job because doing so would likely result in my relationship with my girlfriend breaking down entirely and losing all contact with my children.

Like I said others have worse problems, but that doesn't really help me feel better. I just feel incredibly lonely and unwanted.

[startover22]

What is your current working posotion that you can't find the same kind of job where she is. If you don't mind me asking, since you don't have your family with you, can you find the time to get another job? Would you be against working your buns off for two straight months and using a lot of self control to get back to where you children are? I hope I am not over stepping my boundries here, but there are some choices that need to be made. Tell me a bit more... Where exactly are you in the world and how far away is she? What kind of work do you normally do? Would you be against any work that is lower pay than you would normally make?