[jollygreen52]

I'm almost 22, I've never dated a girl, I'm financially unstable, I hate my job, I hate the job I'm going to school for, I hate the thought of working for the next forty something years and then waiting to die, I'm certain if I ever did get married I'd soon thereafter get divorced, I'm certain if I had kids I'd just screw them up, I have no hobbies, no passion, I'm most often depressed, when I'm not depressed I'm "just okay" and one little bad thing or a bad day will send me back into a depression, I don't like people, I think that most people are morons and I resent them for finding any happiness when I can't, I only have one friend and he's my room mate so I don't really consider him a friend, I don't believe in God, I very much believe that when you die you're just gone, I like the idea of death because then it would be over, and all I want is to be happy.

[J_9]

So, what is your question? Would you like us to try to help you? Will you open your mind to what advice is given you?

[SpawnOfAzazel]

Allow me to ask you this then: what is your definition of happiness, and what do you need [I]right now[I] to make you happy?

[Canada_Sweety]

Umm...... have you ever spoken to a professional or something? Cause you sound like you're terribly depressed.

[jollygreen52]

If I knew what would make me happy I wouldn't have a problem. And no I've never seen a professional. I'm worried that the little magic pill he would inevitably prescribe would make me a zombie. (Not literally of course)

[SpawnOfAzazel]

If you resent people for finding happiness when you can't, then you must have some inkling of what happiness is. So if I were to ask you what is the definition of "happiness", what would your answer be?

[J_9]

It may be time to seek help. That little pill you talk about, some do have side effects, but they diminish in time. Zombie feeling, I know what you are talking about, but it does go away, and when it does, relaxation... happiness... takes it place.

You need to discover what is causing you to feel this way.

[jollygreen52]

Thank you J_9, I may end up speaking to someone. And spawn, the point is that things like reading books, or having hobbies, or a relationship seem to make others happy. But those are things that either don't make me happy or in the case of relationships seem to have potential to make me very unhappy. And I'm not sure how to answer what is my definition of happiness. I suppose, feeling happy.

[SpawnOfAzazel]

Fair enough, Jolly. If this has suddenly started for no given reason and lasted a long time, then may I suggest a checkup for either a hormonal or chemical imbalance to make sure there is no underlying medical cause for you to feel this way. While it's perfectly normal for people to get depressed every now and then, I think yours is on a level that causes great concern. Seeking help is nothing to be ashamed of, and it sounds like you care enough to do something about it. I wish you the best, and I hope you soon find the happiness you're looking for :)

[Dreams of lies]

Being depress and the people around you, you make them depressed as well... it not that fun at all to be deprss... what you could do it grabe a notebook and right about yourdays in that then put them a way it helps me... I know that the world is crole, but we all have to live with it even though others don't. Just one day is that someone you meet will have the same problem, and then you will help them... and if you don't like the job that you are going for then change it then everyone thinks that what they won't to do in life, but you can still change it.. it will be okay... I hope this helps

[theecontessa]

There is hope for everyone... and help too... but you have to want the help. You sound just like my ex. I couldn't be with him any longer because of his negative attitude and lack of interest in finding help. I broke free from him and learned to make myself happy. The biggest change I made was my attitude and response/reaction to things. Once I started responding more positively and realizing that I can't control everything... happiness started to come... I began to appreciate the things/people/experience I did have and that made all the difference. With or without life will go on... no matter what happens life goes on... Good luck.

[Jam43]

Seeing a doctor would not hurt matters . Sounds to me you many need someone to help you sort out things about life. We all go through changes in life, that what makes us grow, the way we think, the way we feel about things in life. Like I always tell myself, if I don't like what I'm doing change it. At least I get satisfaction out of knowing I tried. Also, I'm 44 years old and never dated and I'm OK with that. I enjoy being single. If your waiting for someone to make you happy then you will have a long wait. Happiness comes from within yourself by helping others and being involved in life . Talk to someone it will help.

[elizhuie]

I don't think you can Think your way out of depression, if you are clinicly depressed, which it sounds like you are. Until I took the right medication, I wasn't even interested in getting better. I didn't care. But, meds are helpful and there are many with few side effects. Frankly, I am just glad not to be contemplating suicide every other day. Good luck.

[lifeisweird]

Happiness is never found in death. I don't know why you would look forward to that, sure there maybe things in this world that makes us look at the bad stuff in life, but you have to look for that little bit of happiness and shake of the rest. You have to find that happiness inside of you and making it shine and not trying to be rude or anything stop moseying around and get up and find that passion and try to figure out what you want and nobody else wants. If you want a girl try and find her, if you want a better job quit the collage your going to and try to find out what you really enjoy (dont quit your job until you got another one) don't think about the future think about the present and how you can make it amazing... trust me there are lives out there much worse then yours just be thankful that you still have time to change it and make it right...