[rob453]

'm 20, I go to college, will be sophomore next year. I do care about good grades and also to make there connections. Currently I commute 30 miles which by train takes 1h-1h 30. I was willing to move out, get on campus housing, in May when it was pretty early. I told my mother about this and also older (30) sister when she was vising us. My father is often away from home because he is truck driver. My sister convinced me to not take additional loan on housing and better to still save next year. So I agreed. But recently she moved in with 2 loud children. Our apartment is small and walls thin. Later a fight stopped and she returned home, but surprisely she recently asked me if I want to get on-campus housing. I think now I got good reason to move out to get better of with college and not get too much distracted by family drama. So I submitted and then received by mail confirmation for waitlist. My mother saw that and now is upset that did not tell. But when I was telling earlier she did not even wanted to hear what pros would outweigh cons along with higher cost of education I feel confident to pay after graduation. I explained her that I want to have good grades and get more involved in campus like community service, fraternity, on-campus job. If I get on-campus job then I can even pay interest while in school. But she does not want to hear that I am simply taking more loan for myself. Of course we are in little tough financial situations because my father did not drive much in recent moths so did not earn much money. But it is not like I expect them to pay for my student loans.

But here is the thing... I got to do what I got to do. I am trying to the best I can do with my situation. No one is going to stay up with me and do the overnight cram study sessions for tests... no one is going to help quiz me and review all my work to make sure I am doing the best work possible to turn in. I am going to college for decent education and I feel like my mother is not trusting my choices. In addition I took summer classes and she just today yelled at me that I should have instead have stayed with my last job and work more over summer. But I needed to move on and besides just recently I found new, better job. I have serious consideration and I do not understand why she feels everything is joke. Sure it will cost me more but I am put at higher risk for more stress, worse grades and being isolated if I stay at home. In meantime I wait for on-campus housing decision but what to do with being harassed? Sorry but that is how I feel!

[SpawnOfAzazel]

My only guess is that Mom is dependent on you and doesn't want you to leave home.
You are 20 years old and therefore an adult, and you are entitled to make your own decisions. You are mature enough to realize you've got to do what you've got to do regardless of what anyone else thinks, my compliments to you!
There is no need to apologize for the way you feel. Only you know what is best for you, so let the harassment go in one ear and out the other, or try to find temporary housing in the meantime.

[rob453]

My only guess is that Mom is dependent on you and doesn't want you to leave home.
You are 20 years old and therefore an adult, and you are entitled to make your own decisions. You are mature enough to realize you've got to do what you've got to do regardless of what anyone else thinks, my compliments to you!
There is no need to apologize for the way you feel. Only you know what is best for you, so let the harassment go in one ear and out the other, or try to find temporary housing in the meantime.

I think you made good point. Maybe money is not primary concern.