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Souljakka · Jul 27, 2007, 09:15 PM

Ok, I'll try to make this brief.
I met a woman at work whom I have developed some pretty serious feelings toward. I am about 5 months out of an 8yr relationship of which the last 2yrs were merely co-existence (to rule out the possibility of a rebound).
So shortly after I get with this woman, my good friend tells me she tried to pick him up one day at work. She was sending e-mails to him asking if he wanted to get to know her.
To top it off she was residing with another "co-worker" (male) when we met. She had told me that her relationship didn't cross the friendship boundaries but that my male co-worker (her roommate) was quite obsessed with her. I found this a little disturbing. So after I started dating her, this "co-worker" of mine started to get pretty pissy - he wasn't happy with the situation at all. I thought that this might have meant that there was more to their relationship than she was telling. I feel pretty stupid saying this, but we moved in together shortly after (like 2 weeks in) against my better judgement.
It turns out we are great together! We can lie in bed and hold each other and talk for hours, the sex is great and I think I may be falling for her (she feels the same).
***insert drama bomb here***
So I find out from my good friend (co-worker as well) who had a chat with the "co-worker", that there was in fact more to their relationship that she led me to believe. She was not only sleeping with him, but her kids were hangin out with him and everything. I also found out that not only did she chat up my good friend, but she also chatted up the "co-workers" roommate!! (who also resided with her previously ofcourse).
Anyway there are a few other stories of being sucked dry financially from the "co-worker" to my buddy - as well as some other less important but none the less pertinant info from him as well.
I confronted her on the lies and she admitted to having relations with him. Everything else that was discussed btwn this dude and my good friend are true as well. She says she loves me though, and she has been trying to assure me that she won't just leave me in the dust when the next best thing comes around. Im not too sure I can believe her though - we have even talked about lying and cheating in the relationship, of which we were both completely against... or so I thought.
What should I do - do I dump her now and move on - - or does she deserve another chance sooooo soon??

Canada_Sweety · Jul 27, 2007, 09:25 PM

Oooooh! Sounds harsh.. I think you should maybe wait till you forgive her completely and take a break. I know that it's not my place to say things like that to people but by the sounds of it you are confused and in dire need of some "me time". Think about it this way... do you realllly want to risk what happened to the last guy happening to you? If you are then by all means forgive her now, but I say break time and think of only yourself. Best Wishes.:)

go-ask-mom · Jul 27, 2007, 11:43 PM

Run forest ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun!!

Seriously.

Canada_Sweety · Jul 28, 2007, 09:15 AM

Originally Posted by go-ask-mom

RUN FOREST RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!!!!!

Seriously.

HAHAHAHA!!!! LMA0! You know she's right.:D

Souljakka · Jul 28, 2007, 11:55 AM

OK well I guess I need to put this out there to establish a bit of a base first - she was in a relationship with a guy for about 9 years prior to this "co-worker". She said she slept with him cause it was a comfort thing. She said it didn't mean anything at all. I have decided to accept the fact that she was confused, after all she seems pretty sure that I'm the one she wants to be with for a long time. I expressed my concerns as far as the leaving me for another guy was concerned and she says that it won't happen

Canada_Sweety · Jul 28, 2007, 01:05 PM

It's good that you trust her:)... I just wish you good luck on that being true...

worksleepwork21 · Jul 28, 2007, 02:02 PM

People lie. She was likely trying to conceal things that she had done in the past to keep you from running for the hills!

Women are emotional beings. I think that you should really try to trust her. I know it's hard, when people are honest about telling lies, but she is laying it out there. If you need time to think take it, but if you think you are falling for her-- don't run away because of what she has done in the past-- what about now?