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mesymac · Jul 18, 2007, 12:36 PM

Hi

I am getting married in August 2008, I am having 6 bridesmaids, one of which doesn't return texts when I'm asking about meeting for looking at dresses, she doesn't really seem to want to do it. She is my h2b niece, what can I do what can I say to her? Don't want to be hurtful but would rather she didn't do it!

Thanks maria

startover22 · Jul 18, 2007, 12:44 PM

You really need to just call and talk with her about it. Be honest but sweet. Tell her you are worried because there is not much time left and you will understand if she isn't interested in being that bothered with the whole thing! Good Luck! Happy wedding!

mesymac · Jul 18, 2007, 01:16 PM

Originally Posted by startover22

You really need to just call and talk with her about it. Be honest but sweet. Tell her you are worried because there is not much time left and you will understand if she isn't interested in being that bothered with the whole thing!! Good Luck! Happy wedding!

I have called and texted her that many times and hasn't come back, I have no energy left in contacting her, really wanted her to do it, things cost so much that I need to get planning, might leave that to h2b!

Thanks for your answer maria:)

startover22 · Jul 18, 2007, 01:19 PM

Then she just needs to feel the consiquences of not making the right choices. If she is not responding then you really have no other choice! Good luck sweety!

mesymac · Jul 18, 2007, 02:18 PM

Originally Posted by startover22

Then she just needs to feel the consiquences of not making the right choices. If she is not responding then you really have no other choice! Good luck sweety!

The question is how do I tell her?

Thanks :) maria

startover22 · Jul 18, 2007, 02:30 PM

Ok, I guess if she won't answer any of your calls you need to leave her a message. Tell her that from your heart you wanted her to take on this task but you see that it might be a bit too much for her right now. Tell he you totally understand and you have found someone else to take her place. If you say I love you then tell her that at the end.

Tuscany · Jul 18, 2007, 02:33 PM

I agree with Start. But in addition maybe you could ask her to take a smaller role in your wedding. I know when I got married I had a close friend who was not a bridesmaid come to my house in the morning. She helped the gals get ready, she did my makeup, and she helped with pictures. I would have been lost without her. I am not sure if this is the answer, but it might offer you an easier way out.

victoria_mitchell · Jul 18, 2007, 02:51 PM

If I were you (which I am not) I would simply make her feel like it would better for HER if she didn't do it. Something to the affect of "I realize you are very busy and have so many exciting things going on in your life. It would be unfair of me to ask you to do this. (Then play a little guilt trip)... Besides I am up to my ears in bridesmaids!"

Don't make it seem like you don't want her to do it make her feel like SHE doesn't want to do it. And also, if she's not getting back to you she might be trying to send her own little "I'm not interested hint"

mesymac · Jul 18, 2007, 03:13 PM

Thanks so much, the bridesmaid is my h2b niece she is a sweet girl, but odd in the same sense, she is good natured, but I don't have the time to be running after everyone, I would personally feel honoured to be asked to do this, I just think as you said she is sending suttle hints that she doesn't want to do it.

Thanks all for your help, might let my h2b do this!

Thanks again

Maria:)