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    wild_girl's Avatar
    wild_girl Posts: 26, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Jul 12, 2007, 02:09 AM
    Porn? What's it REALLY mean everyone? Made me psycho!
    A long time ago, I found some pron on the computer my boyfriend was looking at while I wasn't around.
    He says he wanted to "Get off quick", and it meant nothing... I just wasn't there to help him out.
    Ever since I have been crazy about it, searching daily though the computer for new porn... searching the whole entire house... watching through the windows when I leave and everything to see what he's doing.
    I know exactly what all the girls in the porns look like, cause I have watched them over and over-trying to figure out what it is he likes about them, that he doesn't about me, or what he wants from them..
    Please help.. whats up with the porn? Is he bored of me??
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #2

    Jul 12, 2007, 02:26 AM
    You need to relax. Your spying on him and getting all paranoid about nothing.

    Just because he may look at porn sometimes does not mean that he is out sleeping around. Who is he with? Where does he stay?

    It is not him that made you psycho, it is not his behaviour but I think and it sounds to me that you have always had this jealousy and you have always been insecure about yourself which makes you feel the need to act out this way.

    You told him how you did not like it? Right?

    You made it clear how it made you feel, right?

    Well now it is time to move past that incident and stop looking for trouble.

    Joe
    wild_girl's Avatar
    wild_girl Posts: 26, Reputation: 0
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    #3

    Jul 12, 2007, 02:28 AM
    Thanks, I should leave it, I just get paranoid.
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #4

    Jul 12, 2007, 02:30 AM
    Paranoid is not going to help anybody and paranoia just pushes people away.

    Everybody gets that way to a certain extent but we all have to keep it in check, you admit that you have had problems with it. That is the first step in getting help, good for you.

    Joe
    Squiffy's Avatar
    Squiffy Posts: 499, Reputation: 84
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    #5

    Jul 12, 2007, 02:51 AM
    Don't worry too much, most men like to get off to porn, its very rarely a reflection of their relationship. Men need visual stimulation to get aroused, whereas us lucky women can just lay back and imagine our fantasy scenarios if we need a quick fix! If you don't like it, talk to him, but don't worry about it. Just remember he can't snuggle up to a grotty mag in bed! There is more to a relationship than just the sex.
    Skrypt's Avatar
    Skrypt Posts: 156, Reputation: 25
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    Jul 12, 2007, 06:08 AM
    Yeah I also hear watching porn with your partner is a fun thing to do. It's just a quick way to get off and feel good nothing more..
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #7

    Jul 12, 2007, 06:31 AM
    This post, combined with your other one leads me to believe you need help from a professional ASAP as your reactions are way over the top.
    alkalineangel's Avatar
    alkalineangel Posts: 2,391, Reputation: 323
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    #8

    Jul 12, 2007, 06:32 AM
    There is nothing wrong with watching porn, as long as it doesn't become and addiction (when it gets in the way of normal activities) Men are different than women. It is in their basic human nature to "spread the seed" so to speak. They feel the need to have sex more than women do (on average). This is instinctual... its the same with animals. Common beliefs in today's cultures frown upon multiple partners, so men must find other outlets, hence the birth of porn. It is completely normal. Most men do it or have done it and it is completely unemotional. There is no use trying to figure out what the porn star has that you don't, because it isn't about that. It is simply about the sex and nothing more. I would stop worrying about it. Good luck.

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