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cdoss · Jul 11, 2007, 07:43 PM

I live in South Carolina, I had a daughter 10 years ago out of wedlock. It is of my understanding that in SC a child out of wedlock is considered and illigetimate child and is in sole custody of the mother unless proved unfit. Here is my problem... In October of 2006 I got really sick and my daughter was "staying" with her father until I got better. Problem is I got arrested for something that did not involve mydaughter or drugs. I was only in jail two nights and got out on bond. I moved in with my boyfriend at that time for money issues. My boyfriend has a criminal history so my daughters father wanted her to stay with him he was not happy with my living arrangements. I signed a paper saying that he could stop child support temorarily since she was staying with him. He does not allow my daughter to stay over night with me at all. Can he do this? Can he dictate whether I have her over night just because he does not like who I live with. I live in a nice house in a nice neighborhood. There is nothing disfunctional about my living arrangements. He just does not like that my boyfriend has a criminal history.

Thank You

froggy7 · Jul 11, 2007, 07:57 PM

Let me ask you this: If, sometime in the future, your daughter came to you and said she wanted to move in with some guy with a criminal history, what would you tell her? Especially if your daughter had already been in trouble with the law?

If I were the father, I would be trying to get custody of the child. And I would be trying my hardest to keep her from staying overnight in your house. It's not a healthy situation for the child.

cdoss · Jul 11, 2007, 08:57 PM

Originally Posted by froggy7

Let me ask you this: If, sometime in the future, your daughter came to you and said she wanted to move in with some guy with a criminal history, what would you tell her? Especially if your daughter had already been in trouble with the law?

If I were the father, I would be trying to get custody of the child. And I would be trying my hardest to keep her from staying overnight in your house. It's not a healthy situation for the child.

I am not asking what you would do, I am asking if he can do this by legally. I am putting my daughter in a bad environment, have you ever heard of a PAST? Well it is in my boyfriend's past, people really can change.

froggy7 · Jul 12, 2007, 08:05 PM

Do you have any official, court-mandated custody arrangements? Is the dad's name on the birth certificate? If the first is no, and the second is yes, he has every right to have the child in his custody, since a father has as much right to his child as the mother does. Really, if the first is no, that is what you will have to correct, and that means going to court. And then you will have to present an argument that the judge will buy for why the child is better off in your care, and the father will do the same, and some sort of agreement will be reached.