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Live and Learn · Jul 9, 2007, 07:34 PM

Ok... here's the thing. For some reason I will not get on top during sex! Well, I know that I feel really uncomfortable when I am. I mean I think the whole time. I think I'm doing something wrong, or wonder if he's enjoying it. My last boyfriend I was with for 3 years, so I was pretty comfortable w/ him. But every time during sex when he asks me to get on top I say no. Or when he tries to roll me on top. What's wrong w/ me? Why can't I just say screw it & enjoy myself up there. I'm an attractive lady so why in bed I feel so insecure? Sex in general... I never initiate anything, nor do I ever dominate in any way. I always asked myself, how do the girls that sleep around w/ every guy on earth do it? How do the whores do it? No, but seriously. What is my problem & what are some things that will loosen me up & put my defenses down?:confused:

ddog22 · Jul 9, 2007, 07:38 PM

He is enjoying it just for the fact that you are there.

smoothy · Jul 10, 2007, 04:57 AM

No reason to get self conscience... guys love it since you can grind and he can use his hands and arms for more than keeping from crushing you. Like playing with your butt or boobs. As long as you don't move in a way he keeps popping out you can't do anything wrong. So let go relax, and enjoy knowing its almost impossible to screw up.

Synnen · Jul 10, 2007, 05:03 AM

One possible way to relax a bit is to blindfold him. You won't feel as self conscious about it!

You could also ask him to make noises, especially when you do something he REALLY likes on top!

bigdreamer85 · Jul 10, 2007, 06:35 AM

OK here's the scoop... you don't have to do much to actually intiate sex with a man, usually you can just spoon him, make sure your breasts are exposed because they love that and he'll do the rest. As far as getting on top. I'm like you, I let them stay on top until I'm comfortable with them, but it sounds like your ready so next time he asks you or tries to roll you up there, and your still feeeling shy, say something sweet like "sre you sure?" in a sweet/sexy voice and he'll be like YEAH get up here and do your thang girl. Good luck hope this helps

lella87 · Mar 16, 2008, 08:19 PM

I use to feel the same with my first boyfriend. Mainly because I thought.. what if I'm doing it wrong and he doesn't like it.. Then one night I got very drunk, as did my boyfriend and I tried it and I'm telling you.. I've never worked so hard at sex in my life and I enjoyed it sooo much.. as did he :) So my advice... just go for it!