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tamieko2 · Jul 6, 2007, 04:56 PM

My step daughter is 12 yrs. Old, I have been married to her father for 10 yrs. She has been molested at least 4 times in the custody of her mother all by her mothers boyfriends. She has developed an eating disorder (anorexia) and has started mutilating her body by erasers. She has just informed us she is having sex and is bi-sexual. Her mother says this is OK by her. We are paying child support but are unable to see her much due to the fact she lives over 100 miles away. We want her to get counseling but her mom won't do it, she thinks nothing is wrong. A doctor wanted to hospitalize her last year because he thought she was suicidal. I need to know what we can do to get her help or prove the mom unfit to raise her. We don't want custody due to the fact she has too many mental issues and we have 3 other kids to consider.

tawnynkids · Jul 6, 2007, 07:30 PM

Originally Posted by tamieko2

i need to know what we can do to get her help or prove the mom unfit to raise her. we don't want custody due to the fact she has too many mental issues and we have 3 other kids to consider.

I am sorry you need to know how to do what exactly? Your last statements don't make sense. You do or don't want custody?

tamieko2 · Jul 8, 2007, 03:53 PM

We do not want custody we want her to get mental help. Our family is unequipped to deal with her problems, she needs a professional.

excon · Jul 8, 2007, 06:24 PM

Originally Posted by tamieko2

she has been molested at least 4 times in the custody of her mother all by her mothers boyfriends.

Hello tami:

If you had called the cops the mother would never have gotten her again. You didn't. You let her go back. You're as guilty as they are.

excon

tawnynkids · Jul 8, 2007, 07:15 PM

You want her to get mental help but stay with someone who will obviously continue to allow her to be sexually abused? Why would you not want to get her out of that situation and get her the help that she needs? Why would you not want her with someone (you guys) who would not allow her to be abused? I just don't understand that thinking!

tamieko2 · Jul 8, 2007, 08:01 PM

To answer both of you, first of all, the cops were involved in all of the molestations, one man went to prison, she was never in our custody ever to let her go. Children services never got involved I don't know why? She was in counseling for a while but her mother pulled her out because she said all the shrink did was blame her??
Second of all, we cannot raise her because of many reasons, she plays us against each other, and I have 3 other kids to worry about, her problems are too many and too great for us to handle on our own, my husband is a recovering alcoholic (clean 3yrs. 2months) he is really teatering right now on the edge do to her revelation that she is bi-sexual. My family cannot go through him falling off the wagon because of this. Look I just want her mother to step up to the plate and be a mother, we have had very little contact with her since she was 2 and for a while (5yrs.) were not even allowed to see her because of child support issues and her mother. So we don't even know her as well as we would like, we only get called when things like this happen.
Her grandmother wants her so if it came down to her being removed she should go there. I know I probably sound heartless but I am afraid if we took her it would ruin my family. I am just not comfortable risking that I'm sorry.