[SAB123]

hey saab, seen you around the boards a few times but not got around to reading your posts yet, i will make a point of doing so later on.
in answer to this question (bear in mind i do not know your back story yet)...
i think no matter who you are, what your experiences are, you will always miss the person.its natural, and it happens to everyone.
i left my ex, we had been together over 5 years, but over time i knew that i didnt love him anymore.i was faced with staying with him as i felt sorry for hurting him, or be a woman and tell him the truth...it wasnt the best relationship ever, he was very moody,he would get upset at me for the smallest thing, as in if his dinner wasnt ready AS soon as he walked through the door, he would then completely ignore me for up to 2 weeks sometimes, all this in front of our son...so i ended it.
its been 6 years since we split up, and almost two years since i have seen him face to face.
i will be the first to admit that i still think about him sometimes,not in a "get back together" way, and certainly not in a sexual way..just the general wonder how he is doing,where he is in life kind of thing.
it does get easier with time, the more time that goes on the stronger you will feel.

Thanks for taking an interest in all my threads. After you read them you'll probably say why I miss her still. But she no's I was good to her and her son. I just can't think of all the bad she did only the good things we all did together. I just wish the pain and the missing would just go away. I miss hugging, holding of hands and the cuddling. And when she said she loved me.

[emopunk7]

Any updates?

[SAB123]

Any updates?

Last week she drove past my house on Thur and waved kind of like all fingers wiggleing look seductive to me but now I'm analizing everything she does now. The next day she drove past and seen house up for sale. The direction she drove from she went out of her way. Then this Mon and Tue she drove past at the same time both days. I guess to take her son swimming. Then yesterday her sons step brother came over, I didn't bring ex up but he did. He said has she drove but again I said No. He then said Oh she will drive by again. I told him I don't know how many times she drove by because I don't look for her on purpose. But again I'm analizing things, and thought it was weird he brought my ex up, because from the beginning of break up he never brought her up. So as far as I'm concern she STILL has control over me. I just can't wait until house is sold. But a lot of people believe she will be back soon now that house is up for sale. I'm just confused all over again?

[talaniman]

Don't be, she is doing all she can to stay on your mind so ignore that. Just do as you planned and leave her alone.

[talaniman]

I just wish the pain and the missing would just go away.

I think we all feel you on that one, buddy.

I miss hugging, holding of hands and the cuddling. And when she said she loved me.

Heal, and heal right, and someone will be along. That's why we say forget the past, and concentrate on being ready for the future.

[SAB123]

I went on a blind date last night and she was a nice girl. I didn't think of ex at all on the date, which I was surprised. But when I was finished with the date I started comparing her looks and other things she said and did on the date. It's my first date in 5 years and was OK, She was nice but not for me, and when I got home I got upset and started missing ex. Then I started thinking I'm not going to meet anybody I likeMy ex was selfish and a golddigger but she did have some good qualities wich I miss and looking for in the next relationship; excluding the selfishness and golddigging. Is it normal to compare looks and some qualities you did like in ex with new person you date or meet.

[SAB123]

Updates as of 5/25/07 to 6/11/07. Start buy saying she's driving buy a lot now waving when she can and now her son is starting to wave. When they do drive and wave I do not wave but look at her truck when she drives buy maybe because I'm in shock because she's doing this to me again. And this is when I'm outside I don't now how many other time she drives buy. But when I saw her last week and yesterday we were driving coming toward each other I didn't look at her but had sun glasses on and moved my eyes toward her not my head (To make her think I didn't care)and she turned her hole head toward me and she looked like she hasn't slept in weeks. She looked pale, very depressed, and sad looking. When I do go to match.com she has looked at my profile at least 3-4 times in the past week or so. And as of yesterday she has completley taking her profile off match.
When I did look at her profile a couple of weeks ago she changed and deleted things she is settling for any income level and she wrote new stuff on their that makes herself look desperate.

First question is why do I feel sorry for her and still care how she feels noing she threw me to the curb again and didn't care about my feeling when she did it?

Second question is when she drives buy I take leeps back and miss them more and more, But when I don't look or wave to them I feel like finally I am in control of me now and I'm standing up to her. (Acting like I don't care when I see them) I'm hurting more now then I did when they started the drive buys, but I would rather hurt then not standing up for myself?

Third question I know it doesn't matter now and I'm moving forward as best that I can under these circumstance and a lot better emotionally now then I was 2 months ago and from any one who no's my story and what I have said now, I guess my last question is my first origianl threadis do you think my ex fiancé is coming back again. I DON'T want her back but curious if she is. Personally I think she realizes how good she had it and probably thought every guy was going to fall to their knees when they saw her and her new boobs. Well I guess the grass wasn't greener on the other side again.

[SAB123]

It's been 2 months of NC and I know it is wrong but, me and ex past each other yesterday she looked at me but didn't look at her. I went to get food and was coming home 10 min later and she was driving opposite direction again why, prbaly to see if I was going to grocery store, but when she looked me again she looked so sad and from the expression she gave me I think she knows again she made a mistake. But I just want to e-mail her to see how she is doing because she looks sooo sad. I no I can't take her back but she looked so beautiful and maybe we can be friends when I'm fully healed. What should I do?:confused:

[Sdjosh]

I no I can't take her back but she looked so beautiful and maybe we can be friends when I'm fully healed. What should I do?:confused:

You said it right there... you aren't fully healed. Be strong and don't derail your progress. Her emotions are her problem now. You are not responsible any longer for her emotions. She lost that right when she left.

[emopunk7]

Sab... You know it won't be good. Leave it alone... Stay busy... I know how hard it is... I went through that stage and maybe still am. Keep us updated on this. Just don't contact her... This relationship is not good for you at all... Find someone you will be happy with everywhere you go, without this drama!

[SAB123]

I know, I guess I miss her and love her still. I'm just so tired of how I feel. I'm having trouble sleeping again. I just wish she would have never started driving past house and on the street driving. I see her more now driving then we saw each other when we were together. I't just pisses me off she broke up with me again. I didn't do anything to deserve this.

[Sdjosh]

How have you been? Still keeping busy with hobbies and friends? Going to the gym?

[Jiser]

Don't break it, I made that mistake! Ignite her interest more by not bothering. Seriously do not even think about it until you don't give a sh*t, and you probably won't want to when your over her anyway, Leave her in her own confusion, let her wallow in it.

[SAB123]

In the beginning I was down but after about 1.5 months I started getting better and keeping busy, I have a serious back problem so I'm limited to what I can do, but every time I see her now I miss her more and more, I think deep down inside I want her back. If you no my hole story from past break ups she did with me it looks there is 99.9% chance she coming back again, And quite frankly I don't know what I'll do if she does. Some time I hate my life.

[Sdjosh]

Ive read your posts. She does have a pattern. But how long have you been going through this with her? How many months have you been on that emotional rollercoaster? How much torture have you put yourself through thinking about the situation?

You have a good start so far. It has been awhile since you have talked to her. Stay the course.

[talaniman]

Stay with the no contact, SAB, or it will only delay your healing. Stay on the path and get ALL of your health back.

[emopunk7]

Now that she is driving by more, you know she is missing you... The more you continue the more she will miss you and who knows what she will do, but don't expect anything anyway. You are doing great but if u give in before her, it shows her you are weak... Show her once and for all who is the man and move on. You can do it. Don't be sad. You are awesome and I'm sure if you spoke to people in the world they would love to be around you and hear from you. Take that chance instead of wasting it on this drama. There is so much more out there for you especially since you are moving soon... Did you ever sell your house? What happened?

[SAB123]

A couple of months ago I did let go and was doing fine for a couple of weeks but I'm having trouble letting go again, she was my first love so from what I have read on these post I't takes longer to get over the first one. But I miss all the good times we all had together?

[SAB123]

Now that she is driving by more, you know she is missing you...The more you continue the more she will miss you and who knows what she will do, but dont expect anything anyway. You are doing great but if u give in before her, it shows her you are weak...Show her once and for all who is the man and move on. You can do it. Don't be sad. You are awesome and I'm sure if you spoke to people in the world they would love to be around you and hear from you. Take that chance instead of wasting it on this drama. There is so much more out there for you especially since you are moving soon...Did you ever sell your house? What happened?

Not yet a lot of people are looking and some are interested but not yet. I just can't wait until I sell it. And yes you are rite I'm not going to contact her she broke up with me, if anybody should be concerned about any feelings it should be her worried about how I feel.

[Jiser]

Seriously, don't break it. I would be far better than I am now if I hadn't of broken it and by all means she mite even have come back? I would have said no to ;P

You will regret it! She won't forget you, do you forget your 3rd or fourth teacher or random school memories? No way, would you forget someone who you were with for 6 months to a few years? No way hah!

So lets get healed first. When you can honestly say your over her - who knows how long it will take, then perhaps you may want to catch up. You both need to explore, maybe meet other people, my ex is doing so. Who knows what the future holds, I don't want one with my ex.