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JPRyan91 · May 29, 2007, 05:05 PM

Me and my ex have been broken up for about 4-5 weeks now. I've read through some other questions about getting her back. She's said that she loves me a lot, but wants to be friends. She is leaving on a month-long trip very soon and she has made attempts to talk to me, some I've talked, some I haven't.

First she said she wants to be friends but then after we met in person recently she said she didn't know.

It seems like whatever she has, she wants the other.

I've told her she needs space, but she doesn't know what she needs so I really want to call her and just talk.

What should I do?

browneyedgirl78 · May 29, 2007, 08:27 PM

Originally Posted by JPRyan91

Me and my ex have been broken up for about 4-5 weeks now. I've read through some other questions about getting her back. She's said that she loves me a lot, but wants to be friends. She is leaving on a month-long trip very soon and she has made attempts to talk to me, some I've talked, some I haven't.

First she said she wants to be friends but then after we met in person recently she said she didn't know.

It seems like whatever she has, she wants the other.

I've told her she needs space, but she doesn't know what she needs so I really want to call her and just talk.

What should I do?

You know what they say, you don't know what you've got until it's gone. Give her the space you think she needs. I did this once, it lasted 6 months and I thought for sure it was over, until he called me out of the blue, even tracked me down because I had moved.

deedee06 · May 29, 2007, 08:29 PM

Call her and talk about it

mckenzie134 · May 29, 2007, 11:30 PM

Disappear!!

Give her two weeks without you. Turn your phone off , do not answer any messages. She doesn't know what she wants. That is Fine let her not no what she wants on her own..

She no longer has you to lean on!!

She did have but now she wants you gone, you must MUST show her you don't stand for this crap you don't take breaks you know what you want ina woman make her realise she's losing a great guy!!

2 weeks GONE GONE GONE!! This will only help show her what she is missing...

This may sound wrong but is completely the right thing to do in your situation she is just evaluating the relationship and working out how much she likes you. Her interest levels must be dropping.

GIVE HER WHAT SHE WANTS!! SPACE AND TO MISS YOU> WHEN SHE REALISES SHE Doesn't Have YOU SHE WILL REALISE WHAT SHE HAS GOT>..

Let us know how you go??

deedee06 · May 30, 2007, 07:31 AM

Maybe I misunderstood... the guy said that HE told her that she needs space, but that she didn't know what she wanted. She never said she wanted space. I think the best thing to do is talk to her about it because she is probably confused about what you want which makes it difficult for her to choose what she wants.

Jiser · May 30, 2007, 07:33 AM

Get a life where your happy without her, that means do not contact her or involve her in your life.

JPRyan91 · May 30, 2007, 06:50 PM

I just talked to her tonight. I initiated contact.
From what I understand, she wanted to be friends first, I told 4 days ago her that wouldn't work out thinking that It would eventually get her back. Tonight I told her that I do want her back, and she said she was angry and mad at me. I told her I was sorry and that I could be friends with her. Do I still have a chance or is she putting me in the friend zone?
I'm worried that I have ruined my chances with her.

Skell · May 30, 2007, 07:10 PM

You haven't ruined your chances because you never had any sorry to say Ryan. It is over between you and her and any contact between you now is pointless.

She is mad at you because she is finished with you and doesn't want you telling her you want her back. That annoys her.

It is harsh but true.

Time to move on with your life and leave her in the past. It won't be easy but give it time!

dime B · May 30, 2007, 09:57 PM

I agree with browneyedgirl78, maybe if you seem too available to her she might take you for grantit. You should give her some space that way if she really wants to be with you she will definitely contact you. Just before you give her space make it clear to her that you do want to be with her and let her know exactly how you feel so that when you do give her space she won't think that you don't want to be with her anymore and catch the wrong signal from you.

Jiser · May 31, 2007, 01:11 AM

You told her what you felt, she doesn't want it. Leave her in her own confusion and get a life where you single and happy. Concentrate on the things you like. I go down the gym, kayak, play badminton, reading, go to cinema, pub and clubbing.

By breaking up with you she has given you the excuse to get on with your life and she has told you she doesn't want you in hers anymore. We can be friends is an easier way getting rid of the guilt and keeping you in the back burner.

mckenzie134 · May 31, 2007, 05:25 AM

Best way is to tell her how you feel. Then disappear give her time if she wants you se knows what you want. But ewhen she comes back take t slow don't be to cling don't be to certain...

JPRyan91 · Jun 1, 2007, 05:10 AM

Well I'm getting sure that the more we talk the more she is pushed away. When she leaves for a month, I will not contact her and hopefully she will either figure out she wants me back or she never really wanted me at all.

Good Plan?