[sheila8]

My son is four and his real father has been in and out of his life since he was born. He is in and out of jail all the time and never can keep a job. He hasn't seen my son in over a year and I don't think he has any plans to. I want sole custody of my son but he will not sign over his rights. I'm not sure where to go from here and don't know if this could be considered as abandonment. I would really like to know if there is anything I can do about this. Any information would help

Thanks

[tawnynkids]

You'll probably get a lot of opinions as to what kind of a jerk everybody thinks this guy is and what you should be entitled to but boils down to law. He doesn't have to "sign over rights" for you to get sole custody. You just need to go to a lawyer and file for custody. Your lawyer will advise you on what is realistic for you to ask for or not ask for. Each state has their own criteria for abandonment. I never advise trying to get custody on your own, you really need a lawyer. It is a messy procedure and there is a lot at risk.

[1badchoice]

As for abandonment... most of the time it's reserved for leaving a child with no care. He left the child in the care of child's mother, you. You have good grounds for sole custody and support but I'm not sure what abandonment charges would help. They are technically criminal charges. Abandonment as a ground for asking for sole custody is looked at as a reason you should get custody. I know it's wrong... If a woman who has custody dropped kids at "dad's" who has visitation and didn't come back she could technically be charged with abandonment. It sucks but it's a fact. Get a lawyer or go to an agency such as child support enforcement and ask for help making things legal. Cathy