[k9iamnot]

HELP,
My daughter and the neighbor boy were in her room. Dad was outside Mother was taking a friend home.
Always had a rule no boys in the house when mom and dad are not home.
I was gone for twenty minutes.
Came home little sister opened the door and said mOm she has her pants down.
I ran in the room the boy was on his knees she said no she Titan,t I sent the boy home and approched her her pants were still unbottoned and her zipper down.
We talked and she told me he had his finger in her.
She said he asked her she said no he said please and before she knew it it was happening.
I did not even know she had had her first kiss.
We have a great relationship. Why didnit I know.
How do I get more information out of her
Should I talk her to the doctor to find out if she has already had sex
She has a mild learing disability. Could I charge the boy with a sexual assult.
I want to throw up
HELP

[J_9]

Please be patient, the people here that may have an answer to your question may not currently be online.

Now, I will say that a doctor can tell you if her hymen has been broken, but that does not always mean that a girl had sex.

[tawnynkids]

Well, I don't think I would file any charges. (But would just depend on a lot of details you have not provided i.e. age of the boy, trauma to her, etc.) But I just am really not sure because only you truly know the way in which she was saying the no. "NO! Don't touch me" is a whole lot different than "no, not right now my mom is going to come in (hehe)" To me the first is an obvious violation but the second says she is being an irresponsible kid but willing participant and needs stern action.

But the fact is kids experiment, do things they shouldn't, get lost in moments they realize they shouldn't be but do anyway. I would most certainly talk to his parents. Lay down some new ground rules for your daughter.

But there are a few problems here (just in my opinion)
1- Why was dad outside while a boy was inside alone with your daughter?
2- Why did you leave knowing a boy was in the house with your daughter? (I could see if of course you went out and told dad to come in and trusting him to do that)
3- Why was the bedroom door shut?

Those are a few reasons the incident happened in the first place. So you can keep those from happening in the future.

I agree with J_9, you can only find out if her hymen has been broken. Whether she has had sex or not you really need to treat her as if she has now. By that I mean having all the important talks if you haven't already, take the extra precautions to make sure (as sure as you can anyway) that she is not allowed to be in situations where she can have sex.

This is just what I would do (as a mom of an 18, 16, 13, 12 and has been in similar situation) given the information you have provided anyway. But it really depends on a lot of things. I would absolutely take it seriously though. This is not a "oh kids are being kids" kind of thing people can just minimize and push off. I don't know if any of this has been any sort of helpful but maybe it will help just to have another's view on it.

[On_The_EdGe_]

I'm 14 as well and I'm pretty sure she knew what she was doing.
I've lied to get out of trouble could she be doing this as well?