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    flowerscent's Avatar
    flowerscent Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 29, 2007, 10:01 PM
    How do I get my boyfriend who left me to contact me again
    I recently was making wedding plans with my boyfriend and he was really into it as well, and it got too stressful and I blew up at him from the stress. He left me two and a half weeks ago and I haven't heard from him at all. I left a beautiful note in his car last week and mentioned that I was sorry if I said or did anything wrong, and he still has not contacted me. How can I get him to contact me so I can explain to him further why I got that way
    grammadidi's Avatar
    grammadidi Posts: 1,182, Reputation: 468
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    #2

    Apr 29, 2007, 10:21 PM
    I think that by you saying that you were sorry IF you said or did anything wrong indicated to him that you were not claiming responsibility for your actions and he may be concerned that this is the way you will be in your marriage. In a good relationship, couples communicate. I would also be concerned about his inability to communicate and work this out.

    If I were you, I would write him again. This time you should tell him exactly what you did wrong and why you feel that you did it. You should do some problem solving and come up with several ways that you can deal with a similar solution in the future. This will show him that you are attempting to prevent a similar situation. Then you can tell him that you feel communication is important, and ask him to please talk to you so you can work things out together as a mature couple should.

    If that doesn't work then either you said or did something a lot worse than just blowing up at him, and/or he isn't mature enough to work things out in an adult way and you should just let him come to it on his own. You do run the risk of losing him, but if he won't work things out with you, then the relationship isn't strong enough to get married anyhow... which may just be what this is all about. Oh, and MAIL the letter so that you are sure he receives it!

    Good luck!

    Hugs, Didi
    jeremy4719's Avatar
    jeremy4719 Posts: 136, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Apr 29, 2007, 10:23 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by flowerscent
    I recently was making wedding plans with my boyfriend and he was really into it as well, and it got too stressful and I blew up at him from the stress. He left me two and a half weeks ago and I haven't heard from him at all. I left a beautiful note in his car last week and mentioned that I was sorry if I said or did anything wrong, and he still has not contacted me. How can I get him to contact me so I can explain to him further why I got that way

    Well (from a guys perspective) I would have said exactly what I was sorry for, and not sorry IF I said something or did anything... That in my mind would make me think you are just saying sorry to get him back, but not sorry for the actual reason you blew up at him...

    Give it a bit of time, he might be a bit stressed too if you were discussing marriage... I would try calling him or writing him in the next week... Give him a true heart to heart... If you don't hear from him in the next week or so after that, he's probably already moved on...

    Just my thoughts... They could be wrong... ;)

    Good luck!
    tugman_1's Avatar
    tugman_1 Posts: 46, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Apr 30, 2007, 05:45 AM
    Try to call him and see if you two can meet some where and talk things over...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 30, 2007, 05:54 AM
    You will probably have to wait for him to call or comeback. Do you know where he is??

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