[cheyfuzz]

My boyfriend likes my best friend. I am dating this guy. His name is Julian. Julian and I go way back like 8 years. I haven't had very many long relationships. Me and Julian just started dating about 2 weeks ago and already him and my best friend are acting more like they are dating than we do. Everybody is telling me to break up with him but I really like him. They also say I should say something to this girl, but I don't want to cause problems. Can I have your opinion on what I should do??

[smoothy]

Until you have an engagement ring on your finger... he's free to date anyone he wants... as are you. There is no implied exclusivity UNTIL you are engaged.

And if they aren't doing anything inappropriate... get over yourself. Seriously. Jealousy is not an endearing trait.

I'm really, really close to my sister-in-laws... even dated one before my wife. We still are really, really close. I also am with a couple of my wife's really good friends too. But nothing inappropriate happens.

[talaniman]

How old are you both? This is your best friend so don't you go back a while? Hard to imagine your best friend and your boyfriend don't know each other pretty well, so what are they doing different now that you're dating this guy.

Is this grade school? I just don't see this being a problem after just two weeks. What am I missing here?

[DoulaLC]

What specifically are they doing that makes you think this way?

[Fr_Chuck]

I will agree, how old are the two of you, it really sounds a lot like Jr High to me.

But... if you have been "dating" for only 2 weeks, then it is just barely dating, of both of you are free to date others, exclusive dating does not happen normally for a long time after you start dating.

Also, if you have a "best friend" you, like the boyfriend must have known them for a long time.

If you can not?
Ask the boyfriend what is going on. Ask your friend what is going on. Then you do not have a real relationship with either. And you need to review what you consider friends.

As noted, also, if you have known both for a long time, both of them must have known each other years.

Also are you talking about this to everyone, Who is everyone, and if so, it appears the only people you are not talking about this with, is the two people, you should.

[CravenMorhead]

First off this is barely a relationship. You could be dating but are you exclusive? Have you had that talk yet? Have you talked to your "boyfriend" about this?

A lot of relationships suffer from differing expectations. You could be under the expectation of exclusivity whereas he isn't. You could be thinking you're at a certain level in the relationship and he doesn't think that. He could be thinking that you're still kind of friends where you are thinking partners.

There seems to be a LOT of assumptions and non-communications going on on everyone's part here. First step, during study period because this REALLY sounds like a middle/high school romance, sit your "boyfriend" down and talk to him. Ask him the questions you're asking here. State how you feel and why. Don't accuse him of anything. This is how YOU feel, and not what a F**K up he is. Got it? You have to know where you stand and from him. Answer questions that should be asked of him on your own will lead you down a path that you really don't want to go.

One of the major skills you're going to need to learn in life is clear and concise communication. You will need to know where you stand and where he stands. Assumptions and non-communication is toxic to a relationship and will end it.