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monicarachel123 · Jul 29, 2015, 09:54 PM

There's this guy in my college. He is a popular guy in our college. He at times just sees me directly in the eyes. Like sometimes when I meet him suddenly he will look directly at me. I always just see him and look away. Is he looking at me because I'm indifferent to him or is he interested in me? If he is interested in me why hasn't he initiated any conversation with me so far? He also had a girlfriend last semester but still I have seen him looking at me. They are not together now.

Lately when I see him somewhere unexpectedly I feel a tightness in my chest for just a few seconds. What does this mean? Kindly help me because I have never experienced this before.

smoothy · Jul 30, 2015, 12:24 AM

People look at other people, sometimes we like them, sometimes we don't. Sometimes it only appears they are when they are looking at someone near us.

But yes it is possible.. however in most cases if he was... he would come talk to you. He probably doesn't because he still has that same girlfriend.

You are feeling a hormone based attraction, be careful as this is NOT love... something you will learn to tell the difference between eventually.

monicarachel123 · Jul 30, 2015, 02:42 AM

Thank you.he used to see me even before he had a girlfriend and even now when doesn't have one

smoothy · Jul 30, 2015, 03:00 AM

Its not unusual to look. I look at many women (usually those I find attractive). And I'm not even looking to date any of them as I am married. Women do it to guys too.

So it may or may not mean something. Not on its own anyway. here would have to be other actions on his part.

Fr_Chuck · Jul 30, 2015, 03:33 AM

I am happy and married, but I look at a pretty women when they pass. (one of my weakness of the flesh)

So he may merely think you are pretty or sexy.

Perhaps he has wondered why you have not spoken to him. The only way to know the answer to this, try talking to him,

joypulv · Jul 30, 2015, 03:43 AM

You say he's popular.... I'm going to guess that you are pretty and shy, and he finds both of those attractive. He might be looking into your eyes to see if you will look right back, or look away, as you do.
Maybe he's tired of bold women, and likes your shyness.
---OR----
Maybe he's bored and is playing games, because getting you to look away is a tiny conquest for him.
Who knows?
The fact that you are asking total strangers about this shows me anyway that you need to give yourself more power over your life. Stop wondering what other people might be thinking. Be your own person. If you think he's worth a hi, say hi, or smile and keep walking. Play it by ear. You are just as much in charge as he is.

talaniman · Jul 30, 2015, 08:42 AM

I like Joy's approach, don't assume when you could just ask and see what happens. If you are afraid to say something then you will never know what he thinks at all. Of course people can be curious about the stranger they see about often, but if he has made no move then take that as a caution, as he may be curious and attracted, or just looking around and you only see him looking at YOU!

I have no doubt he looks at others also. I also think you are a bit intrigued (but afraid) of this small attention by a popular guy. Inexperienced and afraid though you may be, there is no harm in exploring and experimenting while you gain knowledge of this guy, and of your own feelings and reactions without giving away your heart to a stranger because you are smitten and attracted.

I think that's the best way to get your questions answered from the source and all it takes is a smile, hello, and some conversation. It's a learning experience about interacting with guys for sure, but a bit of courage, and common sense gets you through this.

What's the harm?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 30, 2015, 09:09 AM

Why don't you say hello or smile when he looks at you? There is no way we can know what he is thinking, you are the one there.
Sounds like you have a crush. The ball is in your court. Do something or just wonder.

monicarachel123 · Jul 30, 2015, 09:10 AM

Originally Posted by joypulv

You say he's popular.... I'm going to guess that you are pretty and shy, and he finds both of those attractive. He might be looking into your eyes to see if you will look right back, or look away, as you do.
Maybe he's tired of bold women, and likes your shyness.
---OR----
Maybe he's bored and is playing games, because getting you to look away is a tiny conquest for him.
Who knows?
The fact that you are asking total strangers about this shows me anyway that you need to give yourself more power over your life. Stop wondering what other people might be thinking. Be your own person. If you think he's worth a hi, say hi, or smile and keep walking. Play it by ear. You are just as much in charge as he is.

I'm asking strangers because if I share with my friends, a rumour might spread but I have already asked my best friend. I'm not a shy person. I'm somewhat short tempered.I to talk to guys.its just that I don't smile or talk to strangers or to persons I have not spoken properly before.though he was in my class once, we never got a chance to talk. Besides my career is important to me and I'm not looking for a relationship now. I am just curious to know why he looks at me. What does asking the strangers online have to do with me not having control over my life?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 30, 2015, 09:15 AM

Why do you look at him?
If you are not interested what difference does it make that he looks at you?

joypulv · Jul 30, 2015, 09:23 AM

You expect us to have an idea of what he is thinking, when your guess, being around him in person, would be much better than ours.

That really does relate to control of your life. It doesn't matter what he is thinking because no one but him knows the answer. You feel a need to know, however, rather than acting on YOUR OWN FEELINGS instead of trying to figure out his!