[startover22]

I found a girls phone number in my husbands pocket when I was going to wash his pants. He went out with a friend last night to a bar. No biggie, I tell him to go if he wants to. The biggie here is he is always talking bad about people that this has happened to like saying how disrespectful that is or that is wrong of that guy. Well now I just think he is ALL talk. I asked who is Bethany when he was in the shower today and it took him forever to even come out of the bathroom, usually he is done in like 3 minutes. I don't know I haven't ever felt jealous I have always trusted him, otherwise the going out without me wouldn't be OK. I am hurt, I feel like going out by myself and getting a file cabinet full of guy's phone numbers. I know that is stupid, but I know I could. Why wouldn't he just say no thanks when she handed it to him. He said it was nothing, but girls don't usually hand out numbers unless a man seems attracted. RIGHT? Or WRONG? I am hurt. What do I say now I told him to quit explaining it is making me feel worse and to leave my alone cause I just want to forget it happened...

[Fr_Chuck]

Naw some "ladies" and I use that term loosely see a good looking man or just a man sometimes and just want to (hook up they call it today).

So they will hand them a number to have them call them latter. I have gotten a few myself ( not with a collar on of course). And I have to admit, it does help my ego some for a girl to show me a little attention.

And honestly he must not have meant much to him, or he would not have just left it in his pocket, sounds like he said fine , OK, and stuck it in his pocket and forgot about it.

[talaniman]

Fr Chuck makes a good point. If he had intentions, he wouldn't have left it in his pocket. Make your feelings known though, and get beyond it.

[letmetellu]

If you are in a good marriage and you want it to last sit down with him face to face and get this out in the open. The message could have been a girl that just handed him the paper and it was his last thought about it. Find out if he has met girls and if he has what are you going to do about it. They way you talked in your message: (I am hurt, I feel like going out by myself and getting a file cabinet full of guy's phone numbers.) this doesn't sound like you want to save the marriage very bad.
If this is the first time something like this has happened, give him a break and the benefit of the doubt. I think if he had gone something very wrong he would have had a very good alibi made up to tell you.

[Matt3046]

Call her and make it clear you will have none of that.

[brazygirl08]

Yea I would call her too :) But sounds like he forgot about it... call her

[mckenzie134]

My girlfriend came home about 6 months ago, well I didn't live with her but I went to her house she works at a night club and always has guys hitting on her she is really hot.I was at her place and she was emptying her jeans and she pulled out this paper with a guys number on it and she said here this guy gaveme his number, weather she was trying to make me jealous which I don't thinkshe was cause she never does and if I ever ask her about guys she always tells me about who tried to pick her up and she has said to me before I wouldn't be with you if I didn't want to be and I said well how come you took a guys number and she said I just showed you if anything was going on don't you think I would be hidig it. And that is exactly right its what you don't know that is worse for the fact he just had it sitting in his back pocket maybe you could justsay something like "You woouldnt like it if i went out and had guys handing there numbe to me would you, ext time id rather you think about me. I thought you were different"...

[startover22]

Thanks to all I appreciate the great advise. Of course it will work out. We have a lot to love each other for. Especially our 4 children and 11 years of marriage!