[justice garcia2]

Hi, I'm 17. I had unprotected sex on December 20th 2014 I have had dark brown/light blood heavy discharge for 6 days. Its slowly going away. I also have mild cramps. This whole month I have so far not have had my period. November 3 2014 was my last period. Am I pregnant?

[ScottGem]

You might be. Have you tried taking a HPT?

[J_9]

It would be too early for pregnancy symptoms since you only had sex 6 days ago. Yes, pregnancy is a possibility because you had unprotected sex. Unfortunately you are now playing the waiting game and have to wait until your next period is due. Testing this early will most likely give a false result.

It would be too early for pregnancy symptoms since you only had sex 6 days ago. Yes, pregnancy is a possibility because you had unprotected sex. Unfortunately you are now playing the waiting game and have to wait until your next period is due. Testing this early will most likely give a false result.

[justice garcia2]

Okay yeah I figured I'd have to play the waiting game. I know for a fact that he did not use a condom and he kept going in and out of me cause it hurt and I was pushing him off many times, he stopped after I shoved him off the bed. My next period should come January 4th, so I have to wait 9 days and if my period does not come, do I go take a pee test?

[Fr_Chuck]

You can try a test, when period is due, but, it may take another 2 week, to be about 14 days, late, to test.

[Alty]

Okay yeah I figured I'd have to play the waiting game. I know for a fact that he did not use a condom and he kept going in and out of me cause it hurt and I was pushing him off many times, he stopped after I shoved him off the bed. My next period should come January 4th, so I have to wait 9 days and if my period does not come, do I go take a pee test?

You pushed him off you, shoved him off the bed, but he didn't stop without you having to force him? You were raped! Have you contacted the police about this?

As for pregnancy, wait for your next period. If you miss it, wait two weeks and then test using first morning urine. If that test is negative, wait for your next period. If you miss it, test again or get a blood test done.

[J_9]

It does sound as though you were raped. The bleeding you have been experiencing could be from the forceful sex/rape.

You will have to wait until your next period is due before testing.

Have you reported this rape to anyone?

[justice garcia2]

I haven't reported it because he stopped, we were drunk. I cant report it. Its not accurate. But I do remember everything that happened that night. And I said what happened above... but thanks. Ill wait for my next period, then take a pee test right? And if its negative.. I wait for my next period and take the test again? If I get my period next month Jan 4th , then I'm basically okay right? What if the hard/rough sex delays my period until like jan 14th? Or something? Is it possible for that to delay it cause I know for a fact that it hurt bad, and that's definitely why I was bleeding? But then I also had dark brown discharge for 6 days

[Alty]

I haven't reported it because he stopped, we were drunk. I cant report it. Its not accurate. But I do remember everything that happened that night. And I said what happened above... but thanks. Ill wait for my next period, then take a pee test right? And if its negative.. I wait for my next period and take the test again? If I get my period next month Jan 4th , then I'm basically okay right? What if the hard/rough sex delays my period until like jan 14th? Or something? Is it possible for that to delay it cause I know for a fact that it hurt bad, and that's definitely why I was bleeding? But then I also had dark brown discharge for 6 days

Dark brown blood usually indicates old blood that your system is clearing out.

I do have to ask what you mean when you say:

I cant report it. Its not accurate.

Sweetie, even if both of you were drunk, he doesn't have the right to force you to have sex. If you said no, or pushed him away, then he has to stop. If he didn't, which it's obvious he didn't, then you were raped. Doesn't matter if you were flirting with him, doesn't matter if you agreed to go in the room with him, doesn't even matter if you lead him on, doesn't matter if at first you said yes. As soon as you said no by word or action, he was legally obliged to stop. Since he didn't, you were raped.

Having said what I just said above, if you need help with this just say the word. Rape is hard to prove, but that doesn't mean that you should just accept it. You may not be able to convict him of this, but you will still need help getting through this. That's speaking from the perspective of someone that's survived rape, and child molestation. I know how it feels, and I know that doing this on your own is not easy.

Say the word and I'm here to help. If you don't want to talk now I can wait. I'll be here when you're ready, when you need help.

Okay?

[justice garcia2]

My mom would kill me. Literally she's against everything, my mom would kill me. I cant tell anyone, like I'm embarrassed for what happened and I'm scared if I get pregnant. I don't think I will? I'm scared and I don't want to wait. I feel dumb. I have no one to turn to, I am scared to go get a pee test on my own. I should stay calm and not stress myself out but I cannnnot report this.

[Alty]

My mom would kill me. Literally she's against everything, my mom would kill me. I cant tell anyone, like I'm embarrassed for what happened and I'm scared if I get pregnant. I don't think I will? I'm scared and I don't want to wait. I feel dumb. I have no one to turn to, I am scared to go get a pee test on my own. I should stay calm and not stress myself out but I cannnnot report this.

I understand. I was raped when I was 18, and I didn't report it. My fear was also my parents. Not that they'd hate me, but that they'd pity me, that my dad especially would never be the same again because someone hurt his little girl. So I said nothing, I just lived with it. Thankfully I got lucky and didn't get pregnant from that rape.

Now I'm 44 years old, with two kids, one a year younger than you, and one 5 years younger than you, and I can tell you that as a parent, it would kill me if I heard that one of my kids was sexually molested. The older is a son, the younger a daughter. Doesn't matter what sex they are, rape is rape. It would hurt to hear, it would kill me in a lot of ways, but I'd want to know so that I could do my best to help them with what they would have to face because of what happened, and I know what there is to face all too well.

Reporting it is your choice and yours alone. I won't tell you that you have to report it, I'm not a hypocrite, and I'll also be honest, 6 days later there would be very little evidence left medically, and it would come down to he said she said. It would dredge the whole thing up again, and you'd likely go from being the victim to being the perpetrator in some way. That's the nature of sex crimes. :(

Having said that, I am here to help you with what you're going through. I'm not a psychiatrist, I'm not a social worker, I'm not a mental health expert. I am a survivor of rape, and a survivor of child molestation, and a mother. The help you may need from me, that's up to you. I'm here, and I'll do my best to help. I can't promise miracles, but I'll do my best to direct you so you can put this behind you.

[justice garcia2]

Thanks a bunch. Thanks so much for replying to me and wanting to help. I understand what you are saying and I'm so thankful to have someone to speak to. So well everythings been done and nothing can be undone. Do I just wait for my next period? I missed decembers period? Maybe my period was suppose to come this last week but it didn't because of having intercourse? Do you think that had an effect on my period and it might come Jan 20th? I have no clue when I'm expecting my period anymore? I feel minor cramping and then I had that 6 day darkbrown discharge ?

[Alty]

Thanks a bunch. Thanks so much for replying to me and wanting to help. I understand what you are saying and I'm so thankful to have someone to speak to. So well everythings been done and nothing can be undone. Do I just wait for my next period? I missed decembers period? Maybe my period was suppose to come this last week but it didn't because of having intercourse? Do you think that had an effect on my period and it might come Jan 20th? I have no clue when I'm expecting my period anymore? I feel minor cramping and then I had that 6 day darkbrown discharge ?

There are a lot of things that can delay a period, pregnancy is only one of them. Stress can delay a period, and you're definitely under a lot of stress. Diet, weight gain, weight loss, exercise, medication, illness, etc. can all delay a period.

When was your period due, the one you missed?

[justice garcia2]

SO last month I got my period I checked, I got it on November 3rd... this month December.. I shouldve gotten it December 3rd right? Sometimes my periods are in the early beginning month and sometimes they occur towards the end. I am very thin and I bleed for about 3-4 days a month. I know that I was super stressed this month, the beginning of the month I was really stressed out with grades so maybe that delayed my period this month in the beginning and then having intercourse toward well the end right now.. it may have delayed it but I'm not sure? So I have no clue when ill get my next period. But today I have been having to pee a lot. I haven't drank anything today but I'm in the need to pee and I only today I had small cramps , it comes and goes

[Alty]

So your period was actually due before you were raped. Seventeen days before you were raped. If that's the case, this delay is likely not due to pregnancy, as you didn't have sex until after the delay. Is that making sense to you?

You said you need to pee a lot, and have cramps. This may be your period coming on, since you did state that sometims you get your period towards the end of the month.

Have your periods every been regular? At 17 I would think not, since you're still young and your periods are still regulating.

I'd wait for your next period. If you miss it, test using your first pee of the day, you can get a test at the dollar store, they're just as accurate as the expensive tests. If that test is negative you can either wait for your next period and test again if you miss it, or get a blood test done at a planned parenthood or a walk in clinic.

I do urge you to talk to your mom. Is she a good mom? Do you have a good relationship? I will tell you, I would be mad if my kids went to a party and got drunk when they're underage, but hey, I did it, I get it, and because I did and get it, I also know how much danger I put myself in when I did it, hence the reason I'd be mad. But I'd never condemn my kids for making a mistake, I lived through it, and I expect them to make mistakes too.

But if one of my kids came to me and said "I made a mistake. I went to a party, I got drunk, and I was raped, and now I think I may be pregnant", as a mom my entire focus would be on helping my kid. I'd go in my room and cry after they were asleep, I'd post here, I'd post on Facebook, I'd be mad, I'd be upset, but not at my kid.

Are you sure you can't talk to your mom? She may not respond the way I would, I'm not her. I don't know her. I will say that she may be mad, she may be upset, but if she's a good mom she'll eventually get over it and snap out of it to help you, her child.

She's in your life, we're only online. She can help you so much more than anyone of us here can. But, if she won't, or you feel she won't, we're here for you. But it would be far better to have someone that can physically be there for you long term.

[justice garcia2]

Yes I understand everything you just said. And yeah my periods are I don't think ever quite similar around the same times of different months. Me and my mom have a very poor connection. Its bad and I cant tell her anything, she's also never home for me to be able to talk to her, when I try she gets agitated and annoyed. I'm hoping this peeing and small cramps is a sign of my period coming because I am so scared to get pregnant. I also know that he did not come in me, but as I've read, that sperm is small and you never know. So that's what worries me about being pregnant.. I guess I just wait until jan 4th and if it doesn't come I take the test?

Yes I understand everything you just said. And yeah my periods are I don't think ever quite similar around the same times of different months. Me and my mom have a very poor connection. Its bad and I cant tell her anything, she's also never home for me to be able to talk to her, when I try she gets agitated and annoyed. I'm hoping this peeing and small cramps is a sign of my period coming because I am so scared to get pregnant. I also know that he did not come in me, but as I've read, that sperm is small and you never know. So that's what worries me about being pregnant.. I guess I just wait until jan 4th and if it doesn't come I take the test?

I get my periods once a month though all the time, its just mostly different times of the month

[Alty]

Not having a regular period is normal at your age. In fact, some women never get a regular monthly period. My mom was one of them, she was lucky to get 2 periods a year. That and another medical condition made it almost impossible for her to have a child. She had me in her 30's, only because of many operations.

But at your age it's very common not to be regular. That will change as you get older.

Where's your dad, if you don't mind me asking? Is he a part of your life? Can you talk to him?

Bottom line, you were raped, we can help you or direct you to the help you need to deal with that. Until you get a positive pregnancy test, stop worrying about a possible pregnancy, deal with it if it happens. If it does, you have options, 3 options, and we can help you with that as well.

First order of business, relax, don't stress (I know, that's like asking you to ignore a guy holding a gun to your head, pretty much impossible, but still, that's the only advice I have for you right now). Wait for your next period. If you miss it, test using the first pee of the day. If it's positive, come here, tell us, and then we'll discuss your next step, your options. If it's negative, wait 2 weeks. If you don't get your period, test again, or get a blood test. Google now for a planned parenthood near you. Are you in the US?

Let's take one step at a time. Try not to stress too much. You have options, this is not a death sentence either way. Let's take it minute by minute, and go from there. Okay?

[justice garcia2]

Okay yes that makes sense because I am young. My father is not in my life and has never been, both sides of the family are not in my life. My family disowns everyone. So right now I will wait until the 4th and I will take the test. I will report back to you what the results are. That will be the only thing I allow on my mind right now. I agree with not making myself stress out more cause I tend to do that. I will stay calm and wait, one step at a time. I am in the US, I live in Surprise, Arizona.

[Alty]

Good. Do your best to just take one step at a time. There are a lot of great people on this site, they, and I, will be here for every step when you need us. Just post, and we'll be there when we can be. Do remember that we can't be here 24/7, we have jobs, kids, lives, we volunteer for free. So if you post and don't get a reply right away, just be patient, we'll see it when we come to the site, and we'll respond as soon as we see that you posted.

[justice garcia2]

Okay that's great. Thanks. I understand that it may take time for you to reply. That's okay as long as I can still be able to talk to you about my situation. It doesn't matter how long you take, as long as I'm messaging you cause right now I am not comfortable talking to other people