[Bensontom321]

I want some advice :( I'm 21 and my girlfriend is 19. Back in 2012 we started dating and went on for a year and a half. In that time we were on and off due to her talking to boys in a "more than friends" way and 2 of the times were were "off-again" she slept with 2 different guys. We finally broke up and stopped talking for about 10 month. We randomly started talking again and got back in a relationship, which has been going preeeettttyyyy strong for the past year. She has told me how she's changed and how the "old her" is long gone. Welp, in the past week a bunch of stuff has been going wrong. First off, I've seen her internet search history and she was looking up Facebook pictures of one of her old flings. Secondly, I read her diary (I know it's bad) and she was talking about how she thinks a few of her coworkers are cute and she put winkie faces and stuff. And lastly! A old guy friend that reallllyyy liked her msged her on Facebook and she asked for his number, then she deleted the messages. I know it sounds like I have a trust problem because I do, I've gone up to my girlfriend a few times and told her these problems and she's said "Your the only one I have a crush on, either you trust me or you don't". Now, I love this girl more than anything but I'm wondering if I'd be better off without her. She didn't have the best upbringing and her dad wasn't around at all, and she's spilled her heart out multiple times and I know Im a positive influence in her life. I don't know what I should do, help please?

[Precious7]

Hi Ben,
On and off relationship doesn't sound healthy but you said that now its going strong. As she has told you that ''how she has changed and the old her is gone''. I would say that, you see what her fruits are and decide! If she is really changed and u can see that, then you can communicate with her and give her a chance. And if her fruits are opposite of her talks then probably this time you take one decision to stop continuing the relationship and never get back together, not even randomly.

[odinn7]

Sounds like a mess anyway but...if there is no trust, you have nothing. What she's doing could be innocent but at the same time, it may not be. You will have to figure that out and decide how you want to proceed.

[talaniman]

She had it right. Either trust her or you don't, and if you can't stop the snooping behind her back, you should leave and work on your own issues. Sorry guy, but you don't sound like you can put things behind you, and stop making the worst in yourself even worse. Maybe you think you have good cause to snoop, but if you do, you should just remove yourself from the situation anyway.

[1bluesky]

Ask yourself a question: is she interested in me being happy? If the answer is NO, then forget her.
If the answer is YES, then you must ask yourself another question: does she have what I need? If the answer here is no, then leave her. If the answer is Yes, then see how you can make her being happy.

Note: it is of a crucial importance for you to answer those questions truthfully. It's for your own sake.