You say you don't have anyone to talk to right? But you mentioned the only reason you try is because of God? Why don't you pray? Ask for help? Ask him to guide you through these tough moments of your life. You can also talk to your priest or bishop. Attend church. Get involved in church activities. You can always make true friends there. Hope this help. And Like alkalineangel said, "you have plenty of friends right here" Good Luck :)
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