[Laiba Asim]

How do i get rid of my anger? Sometimes i get angry on even minor things and afterwards i realize about my mistake.

[Laiba Asim]

If a person is outspoken and blunt what things can be done to make him/her polite and can this habit ruin respect of that person?

[smoothy]

That's their personality... perhaps those that feel a NEED to change them, take a closer look at their own hypersensitivity, and self righteousness.

Meaning... the person pointing a finger at someone else accusing them of something has three other fingers pointing back at themselves.

Also, people who live in glass houses shouldn't be throwing rocks,

or Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

I'm 53, in my life so far I've known all types of people, from several Bishops in the Catholic Church to one particularl Murderer, as well as a number of high and low level Political figures of several countries.

You accept people for who they are, as they are. And you don't confine your circle of friends to those who think as you do. And you can respect people who don't act as you think they should. But nobody HAS TO. There are without doubt those around you who feel you should change certain things about yourself, who keep it to themselves. That is true for everyone without exception.

Type A personalities tend to be what people who aren't would call outspoken adn blunt. Everyone isn't timid and reserved.

However like everything ......there are socially accepted norms of behaviour...and if those were crossed or not and by how much.

[joypulv]

My answer would depend on whether you are talking about yourself.

[Fr_Chuck]

We all get angry, it is a normal emotion. So we should not get rid of it, Is it an issue, or how you react? Do you over react ?

[Jake2008]

Nobody gets rid of anger. It is a normal emotion, that we all have.

Anger can be better understood, and controlled, by realizing that you have the ability to do so. For instance, you can control your anger (I hope) while checking out at a grocery store, and realize that the cashier has charged you the wrong price for a head of lettuce, right? You don't freak out over a head of lettuce, in a crowded store, because to draw attention to yourself would likely have bad consequences.

I assume that your anger is more directed, which in itself is control too. You would wait until you got home, and start complaining about the cost of the lettuce, and maybe throw it against the wall. You were stewing about it all the way home and the anger finally came out.

With the lettuce, you know the trigger that caused the anger. It's the same with what you have described about getting upset over little things. Only you don't have any stops it seems, and likely involves another person, or other people, and you don't know where it comes from, or how to control it, but it always ends up in one important place- not dealt with properly.

Try thinking more about the anger itself. When it happens- i.e. is it over an issue that has been bothering you since last Friday? Then think about why you are letting the issue take over your life until you explode. Try writing in a diary to get the thoughts and anger out on paper so they make more sense.

Try, really try, to figure out why you allow anger over small things, to take over. Try to see patterns in your behavior, and opportunities missed to resolve the anger before it is out of control. Talking is another good way. Figure out if you are not getting enough sleep, or narrow things down a little to where you can pinpoint when the anger started to build. Where were you, what were you doing, who was in the picture, and how you handled a problem.

I think you have more control over your emotions than you think you do, but you are getting bogged down, and aren't really thinking. You need to just sit in a quiet place, write out your thoughts, or call a girlfriend or sister, and get opinions on what they think about the trigger situation that has caused you to lose your grip.

Outside eyes from an honest person can help more than you know. As you learn to deal with it, so too you are dealing with an emotion that you can have m ore control over by you controlling 'it', rather than 'it' controlling you.

[smoothy]

Since two questions were combined... and I personally view being outspoken and blunt as being unrelated to issues with anger in most cases, though angry people tend to be vocal about it usually.

Anger issues are serious if they are frequent, and arrise over minor things.

Everyone gets angry from time to time... everyone however doesn't get angry over little things... or frequently over little things. I don't consider being mildly upset as the same as being angry.

If it does, then Anger Management therapy is in order before it becomes an issue that gets you into serious trouble. Which is all a matter of time.