[SOCHA]

I found condoms in my boyfriend's car of two years. I was cleaning and I found them under some paper in the back of a passenger seat. We do use condoms but we never make love in the car, not even once, and we never had sex anywhere else apart from in the house. So the condoms were of different brands and all of them were opened. I confronted him and asked him why he is keeping condoms in the car, he then said its for us, that he keeps them there in case they are finished in the house. He is lying because every time when we buy from the shops we put condoms in our drawer. And not even a single time have we took a condom from the car when they were finished in the house.

Later on he changed his story saying that he sometimes gives them out to his friends when they asking for some. He swears he is not cheating, and we are in a very lovely relationship, his phone does not receive calls at funny times and he respects me but this story just doesn't add up, and his reasons are lame and doesn't apply to our relationship.

NOW THE BIG QUESTION IS COULD HE BE LYING? IS HE SLEEPING WITH OTHER GIRLS?

[tickle]

You know him better then we do. How would we know this ?

[Fr_Chuck]

He could be. Or he was hoping to do it, with you, in other places other than. But his change in story could be because of lie or it could be, that you keep asking him and asking him, he changed story, since you ddii not accept what he said.

[Oliver2011]

"I found condoms in my boyfriend's car of two years." The condoms are two years old? The boyfriend is two years old? The car is two years old? Very confusing sentence.

He could be sleeping with other girls. He could be sleeping with other boys. He could be handing them out to his friends. They could have fallen out of the grocery shop bag for all we know. It doesn't matter what he tells you, you aren't going to believe him and if you keep hounding him about it, he will leave you.

"all of them were opened" - What does that mean? Used condoms? Open packages and not used? They would be breakable condoms at that point.

[SOCHA]

@ oliver, I said we have been dating for two years.

When I say all of them were opened I mean that they were not in their original boxes, different brands and there was 1 left of each brand.

[Oliver2011]

"@ oliver, I said we have been dating for two years. "

No that's not what you said. But you said it this time and it's more clear.


"different brands and there was 1 left of each" Again, much more clear. When you are giving information read it back to yourself and see if it makes sense and especially will it make sense to the reader. That way we can do better with our answers.

So what can you do now? You can never trust him again and that will lead to you two not being together. Has he given you reasons in the past not to trust him?

You can trust what he says and move on from this. But this would mean not asking and asking and asking about it. I don't think he was too concerned about your discovering the condoms otherwise he would have hid them better.

How old are you two anyway?

When I say all of them were opened I mean that they were not in their original boxes, different brands and there was 1 left of each brand.

[DoulaLC]

The car would not be a smart place to store condoms to begin with. Different from what you normally use?. Okay, he may have wanted to try a different sort... not unusual, but why keep them "in the car in case they are finished in the house", why not bring them into the house where you actually use them? After all, the ones you normally use are in the house. That is a bit strange, and I can understand your wondering about it. Gives them out to friends? It could happen.

Do you normally purchase the condoms that you use or does he?

It really comes down to whether you believe what he is telling you. Do you have reason not to believe him? Anything in the past that would cause you to wonder? Only you can answer those questions.

You will either have to continue to let it eat at you and cause you to worry, which will likely cause conflict in the relationship... accept that what he has said is the truth and let it go (keep in mind that you feel that you have a lovely relationship)... or, if you don't believe him and can't let it go, then perhaps the relationship is coming to an end.

[ma0641]

"I found condoms in my boyfriend's car of two years." That's what you said.

[SOCHA]

@oliver2011, thank you for your answers. By the way we are 25 and 30 years.
And no he has never given mi a reason not to trust him before.

[SOCHA]

@doulalc, no they are the same brands that we normally use. And he has never done anything ever since we started dating. And I never purchase condoms he is the one who always does. U see if his answer was different, if he hadn't said he is keeping them for in case the ones in the house are finished, I wouldn't be having this problem trying to believe him. But thank you your response was helpful

[smearcase]

Your evidence is insufficient for a conviction. Release the perp on his own recognizance. Maybe you should just consider secret probation for a while.
My best guess is that he had them there from some time he thought he might get lucky.
Don't know if that was 2 plus years ago or maybe not so long ago that he stored them there.
But if they were there for a couple of years (from before you two got together), that's what he should have said.
"Hold everything, I have to run out to the car and get us a condom", No, I agree with you there, not very likely.
If that were a good plan I would keep spaghetti sauce, pop tarts, and hershey bars in my trunk. (Heat in car would not be good for those items or condoms actually)
One positive is that he most likely planned to use a condom if something did come up, and that would help protect you.
Give him another chance, badgering won't help if the relationship is otherwise as good as you say.
Be cautiously optimistic.

[SOCHA]

Thank you very much smearcase. My intuition also tells me that there is not enough evidence, there could be many possibilities why he kept them there but only he himself knows the truth, I will keep an eye on things, and for now I will believe what he tells mi, our relationship is just so good for mi to just up and leave when I Am not sure about the conviction. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE ADVICE

[Oliver2011]

Good decision.

Thank you very much smearcase. My intuition also tells me that there is not enough evidence, there could be many possibilities why he kept them there but only he himself knows the truth, I will keep an eye on things, and for now I will believe what he tells mi, our relationship is just so good for mi to just up and leave when I Am not sure about the conviction. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE ADVICE